What a season this has been. We’re only a couple hours away from crowning another Survivor winner. Since our live blogging was such a hit for Big Brother, Patrick and I decided to do it all over again for Survivor: Samoa’s finale. Who will be this season’s sole Survivor- Russell, Nathalie, Brett, Mick or Jaison? Sit back, relax and stayed tuned to our realtime comments and opinions.

Donovan: OMG, I’m so excited. I hope there are major fireworks during jury questioning.

Donovan: Wow the recap is giving major props to Nathalie and Russell. Could they take it all.

Patrick: Recap, recap, recap. Let the games begin!

Patrick: Eww, Jaison said that he had diarrhea all night.

Donovan: Love Russell bitching about his lame-o partners and that he should be playing with superstars. According to spoilers, he just might get his wish.

Donovan: Oh, I feel so bad for Nathalie. I can’t believe Russell is telling her she’s next if Brett wins the next immunity.

Donovan: LMAO. “If Jaision can win two immunities in a row, so can anyone else”. I love Russell’s trash talking.

Patrick:I’m so routing for Brett in this immunity challenge after all this build up! That will make the jury interesting, since they are all his former teammates. Will that help him??

Donovan: Immunity challenge. GO NATHALIE GO.

Donovan: Shit, Russell is flying through this course with Jaison close behind. Wow, even Nathalie isn’t too far. It’s anyone’s game.

more live blogging after the jump

Last night, Jonny and Kodie came over to hang out. While the main purpose of the visit was to chow down on some McDonald’s and then relax in the hot tub (we’re fun and ironic that way), we sat down and watched the penultimate episode of Survivor Samoa. No disrespect to Brian, but watching Survivor with an uber fan like Kodie makes it far more enjoyable, especially when they can recite obscure Survivor facts at the drop of a hat.

From the onset of the episode, you knew it was going to be all about SHAMBO’s hair. First we get a shot of Brett massaging her ratty mullet, then the next morning Shambo talks about wanting to cut her hair. Russell can’t stand her hairstyle and is almost inclined to vote her off so that he doesn’t have to look at that bushy hair anymore. Apparently, according to Russell, Shambo uses her bird-nest type hair to stash away food like bananas, coconut, peanuts, etc… Haha.

While Shambo and Russell discuss superficial things like hairstyles and grooming, Brett and Nathalie bond over being “prayer warriors” and recite bible proverbs and psalms to one another. I swear if I ever make it to Survivor or any reality competition show, I’m going to brush up on my readings to use as part of my strategy.

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Ever since Russell Swan was taken out due to a medical emergency and subsequently, the scheduled double tribal council canceled, I was wondering when the producers were going to make that up. Well, tonight my mind no longer needs to wonder. This episode, we got two immunity challenges, two tribal councils and two eliminations- thank God, because some of these fools need to leave my TV screen stat.

During last week’s tribal council, not only was John blindsided when he was voted out, but Shambo was blindsided as well as she wasn’t in the loop with the group’s decision. Worried Shambo might be feeling shafted- rightfully so- Russell does a bit of damage control and lies about John being on the war path against her. Being her usual Alicia Silverstone clueless self, Shambo buys it and doesn’t even think about turning on them.

After 30-something days, we finally get a bit of strategy and confessional time with super under-the-radar survivor, Brett. During a candid conversation with Jaison, both Monica and Brett learn Russell is a millionaire and in turn they let Jaison know they’d vote for Mick and Russell if they make the final tribal council. After detecting a bit of dissension, Brett swears to look for the kink in the Foa Foa armor to stay alive.

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After a week off for Thanksgiving, Survivor came back with an all-new exciting episode. Normally I don’t spoil the episode and immediately mention who got booted, but I’m going to make an exception because I’m still grieving from what transpired. My survivor boyfriend, John, got blindsided tonight. Poor guy never saw it coming. In memoriam John Fincher.

Aiga heads back to camp, still celebrating from banishing the wicked witch of the southeast, Laura. While Foa Foa and Shambo rejoice Laura’s demise, the former Galu’s realize they are up shizz creek and have to head back to the drawing board.

The next day the survivors get an envelope each with 500 big ones from tree mail- it’s time for the ritual Survivor auction. This season, Jeff explains that pooling money and sharing the auction is strictly prohibited. As auctions go, nothing really out of the ordinary happened- some people won stuff, others didn’t. Here’s the breakdown of who won what:

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Since it’s a holiday and most people are having dinner and otherwise occupied, Survivor gives us another one of their much-hated recaps. I guess a recycled episode is better than a repeat or none at all. I love how the first few minutes of the episode recapped what we’ve seen thus far. So in essence, it was a recap within a recap. If you factor in, me writing about it, I’m essentially writing a recap about the recap within the hour long recap.

So, here’s the first few minutes in a nutshell. Galu was a powerhouse on the battlefield (challenges), but Foa Foa was better adept with the social politics of the game. Both tribes lost a member due to a medical emergency. Having won most challenges, Galu only went to tribal council just once- adios Yasmin. Upon the merge, Foa Foa’s plan was to infiltrate the enemy fortress and find the crack- they’re talking about you, Shabmo. That’s all she wrote. Wow, that was tiring. I’m spent.

As with all recaps and bonus episodes, they always make grandiose statements about giving us never-before-seen footage that will reveal things that will rock our world. If the footage was that good, why didn’t it make the original episodes. As expected, Probst in usual TV voice promises that the episode will reveal new strategies, new insights and new scenes. You better deliver Jeff, or else…

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I’m still reeling from all the excitement from last week’s blindside. I haven’t been this excited for a new Survivor episode in years. It’s all about the “Foa Foa Four” during the recap and their plight as the underdog. One by one they’re knocking the former Galus out the game despite being doubled in numbers when the tribe merged. From the sounds of the recap, look for Foa Foa to take out another Galu this episode.

The episode titled, “The Day of Reckoning” starts off with Aiga returning to camp in the wake of Kelly’s blindside. I absolutely loved the ominous music playing in the background, as the survivors headed back to camp in slo-motion. While the former Foa Foas are reveling in their mini-victory, Laura and her posse are trying to pick themselves up. Understandably, Russell is feeling like he’s on top of the world. He even claims he’s like Picasso and last night’s shake-up was his best masterpiece ever. And the jubilation even extends to others as well. Shambo and him can’t stop laughing at Laura’s misfortune. She even hopes she finds the hidden idol, only to give it to Russell so they can sock it to Laura again. Should’ve been nice to Shambo at the beginning, Laura…tsk tsk.

Even though the former tribes are still split 6-4 in favor for Galu, Shambo has clearly aligned herself with Foa Foa, thus evening the numbers at 5-a-piece. Trying to avoid a tie vote at council, Shambo starts working on John to have him flip over to their side. Even though John doesn’t commit to Shambo, he promises to keep their conversation private. At this point in the game, Shambo can no longer hide her disdain for Laura and calls her viperous, beastly and all other kinds of names.

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A few episodes ago, I whined and complained how slowly this season was going, BUT did that ever change last episode when the merge occurred. As good as last week was, this one was EVEN BETTER. I was on the edge of my seat throughout the episode and during tribal council, I literally screamed. What caused me to show such an open display of emotion? If you watched the episode, you’ll know but if you didn’t… read on.

During the “previously on Survivor” segment, Natalie receives a lot of praise for orchestrating Erik’s blindside. Seriously, the editing makes her sound like a strategic mastermind. Who knew a member of the “dumb ass girl alliance” would be such an integral part of the plotting. I’m getting the strange feeling she’s either getting booted or receiving a “Mark Burnett winner’s edit”.

If the recap didn’t give enough love to Natalie, the first five minutes of the episode definitely did. We see everyone’s favorite blonde Foa Foa catch a glimpse of a huge rat. Instead of screaming like your typical girly girl, she contemplates killing it with either a rock or a stick. She chooses the later and scoops it up with a coconut shell. YOU GO GIRL. She brings the dead rat back to camp, much to everyone’s surprise. Apparently when barbecued, the little rodent tastes exactly like chicken, according to Natalie.

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Down to only four tribe members after voting out Liz, Foa Foa needs divine intervention at this point if any of them have a shot of winning this game. Jaison, Mick, Nathalie and Russell H. head back to camp feeling even more dejected and agree to stick together when the merge happens. They even devise a plan to divide and conquer the Galu tribe when it occurs. With Galu’s eight members, that assigns literally 2 Galu members for each Foa Foa. Should be manageable right?

During last week’s preview, the powers-that-be hinted either Erik, Monica or Laura would be going this episode. Wasting no time, the editors immediately showcase an argument between Shambo and Laura regarding missing canteens. During canteengate, the two passively aggressively go at it, complete with a hilarious whiny impersonation of Shambo by Laura. As the quarrel continues, Erik comments that everyone knows Shambo is crazy and if you engage a fight with her, you come off even crazier. I love how most of Erik’s confessionals are in this wicked hollow tree.

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Is it me or this season of Survivor moving at a snail’s pace? I can’t believe we still have 13 castaways to deal with. Remember the good old days when we started with only 16. I digress. We’re reminded of Russell S.’s evacuation and Monica and Liz potentially being the ones to go on their respective tribes during last week’s recap. The fact they mention Liz or Monica was going last week, makes me wonder if none of them are going this week and we’re in for a surprise boot. Hmmm, could it be. God, I hope so. I need a much needed huge shake-up to keep me interested with this season.

Since Galu is without a chief, the men of the tribe decide to bring Shambo over to the testosterone side and concoct a plan to elect Shambo as the chief without the other ladies knowing. During some odd finger voting method, Shambo is officially picked as the chief to the shock of the Galu women. Dave feels uneasy with Shambo on their side and worries she might be dumb enough to spoil their plans. All this editing with the Galu men stating Shambo isn’t smart enough or ruthless enough to play the game suggests to me that Shambo screws all the boys over later.

REWARD CHALLENGE
Yay, we actually get a reward challenge and not some double challenge bullshizz. It’s another recycled challenge used in season’s past but with a new twist. Rather than just being a straight up life-sized memory game, the leader is given the choice to keep the matched item and forgo a point or just score the point. Galu sits out Shambo, Kelly and Dave. Since Shambo sits out, she must designate a proxy chief for the challenge. She chooses Erik first but Dave says “NO” and instructs her to pick Brett. Looks like Shambo’s reign has much power as the monarchy in modern-day England- NADA.

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