Previously on America’s Next Top Model, Tyrant made up for the surprise Alisha/Eboni double boot with a recap episode of never before seen “highlights”. I didn’t watch. Obviously. I was busy. Well… not THAT busy, but I hate reCRAP episodes. Before that however, the final three battled it out in a giant perfume bottle for ANTM scented glory. Annaliese, despite overcoming Kelly Cutrone’s powerful hate-on for her, could not pull off a surprise run to the finale and got the boot. That left us with the two blondes… one Yank and one Brit. There’s a shocker. For the most part, this season has been lackluster and drab with a few stand out episodes… but hardly anything to celebrate. So who will take home the crown? Laura or Sophie? Does my fave Sophie have a shot? Can a British girl really win AMERICA’S Next Top Model? Does Tyrant even give a crap about what any of us think? Only two girls remain. Who will be America’s Next Top Model?
Alright peeps… it’s time to put this Cycle to bed! But first, I gotta tell you about Snow White and the Huntsman. Dan and I just checked out the advanced screening. It should be called Bella Swan and Thor Go on a Psychedelic Acid Trip With Charlize Theron in Fierce Couture. Seriously. It had some pretty amazing moments, but really didn’t know what it was trying to be. That being said, Charlize Theron is effing FIERCE. And better yet… the FASHION. Dan and I were living for her outfits. The bird skull trim! The feathered cowl! The silver dangling chin straps! Epic.
Are we witnessing the final days of “America’s Next Top Model“? It sure feels like the CW has thrown in the towel with the veteran reality show. First there was last week’s announcement that the Tyra Banks show was being banished to Friday nights. Then the network decided to air a recap episode this past week, pushing the Cycle 18 finale past the May sweeps official end date. With the numbers the show is pulling in, I don’t blame them. Even with the new judges and upcoming college edition coming Fall 2012, I think the show will be dunzo come Cycle 20. But enough of the future, let’s tackle the present.
We began Cycle 18 aka the British Invasion Cycle with 14 girls and now we’re down to the final two. Not surprisingly, we have one Brit and one Yank remaining in the competition. While Sophie as the last Brit standing isn’t a shocker, Laura as the lone American is. I firmly believed it would’ve been either Eboni or AzMarie at the beginning of the cycle.
As always, the final two pose for their potential CoverGirl ad and engage in a runway battle for the ANTM crown. For the first time in “Top Model” history, the women will take part in a holographic runway show interacting with lifelike images and also walk in sync with the outline of their own bodies. What will Tyra think of next? LOL. Check out a few runway preview pics along with their CoverGirl ads below. Be sure to post your winner prediction in our comments section after checking out the pics.
Previously on America’s Next Top Model, there was a lot of blubbering as the wannabes had to pose on the edge of a building and a couple of them almost crapped their pants. There was also some heavy panting as Laura lusted after a Hong Kong action star amidst accusations from the others of sluttery. And if that wasn’t enough drama, Alisha tried to fall on her top model sword for Eboni of all people and offered to go home instead of the pigtailed wonder. Tyrant was not amused. She sent them both packing. Crazy! Almost as crazy as Kelly Cutrone’s ongoing hate-on for Annaliese. How many times will Laura say sex? Will Annaliese be able to convince Kelly that she’s a model? Can Sophie rebound from her fear-filled photoshoot? Only three wannabes remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?
Here we go folks… the penultimate episode that will decide the final two of one of the most lackluster Cycles on record. Ratings are down, our patience with Tyrant is running razor thin, the photoshoots were average with only a couple standouts, the drama was artificial, and there were a lack of girls to really root for. But hey… that could all change if Sophie wins! Team Sophie. And in the immortal words of Robyn from Cycle 1…. “Oooooooh Jesus”!
How many of you are still reeling from last night’s “America’s Next Top Model” episode? Like Rich, I’m in shock Tyra had the balls to not only let Eboni go, but not save her after Alisha quit. Who is this new Tyra? I can definitely get on board with this new version for Cycle 19, especially if she keeps us on our toes.
Speaking of which, this has to be one of the more unpredictable cycles in recent memory. I really thought, AzMarie had it in the bag, until she pissed off Banks. Then I thought it was Eboni’s for the taking. It’s been a few cycles since we’ve crowned a black winner, and thought Cycle 18 was it. Is Annaliese now the frontrunner, especially with Nigel’s comparison to fan-favorite Mercedes from Cycle 2?
In the next episode, the Final 3 pose for British fashion photographer Jez Smith. At the photo shoot for the “America’s Next Top Model” fragrance, Dream Come True, the stakes are raised as the models pose in front of the client, Hatch Beauty founder Ben Bennett. As cheesy as the ANTM fragrance is, I have to say, the images are absolutely stunning. Laura, Annaliese and Sophie all bring it. I can’t even imagine who the judges will cut. If Kelly Cutrone has her way, Annaliese is a goner. Check out the pics and see who you’d cut.
Previously on America’s Next Top Model, the wannabes landed in Macau for this year’s international trip. They’re staying in a pretty swank place but had to endure one the Cycle’s lamest challenges… astrology reading… before throwing on some silk worms for a photo shoot. Tyrant managed to pick a terrible shot of Catherine to justify sending her home over darling Eboni who took one of the worst photos of the entire season. That girl’s neck was nowhere to be seen… one of Top Model’s most deadly sins. Oh Tyrant. You’re so special. And by special I mean transparent and hypocritical. Will Eboni’s pigtails keep her in the game? Can the Brits stay in the lead? Who will get manipulated off the show? Only five girls are left. Who will be eliminated tonight?
So here we are. Down to five. When you look at the girls left… does anyone other than Sophie or Laura even have a shot? Granted, it should’ve been AzMarie, but she got kicked off because she pissed off Tyrant and didn’t booty tooch. The thing is, AzMarie’s “brand” was androgynous and probably shouldn’t have been booty tooching according to Tyrant’s book of nonsense. If one of the blondes goes home tonight, I’ll lose it. You have been warned.
WOO HOO. I have to pat myself on the back for correctly predicting FCO (first call out) and the girl leaving from last night’s episode. Where do I apply to fill the vacated seat at the judging panel, because I rock. I probably wouldn’t last an entire cycle though, because Tyra would catch me rolling my eyes at all her cray cray antics. That said, I hope I can keep the streak alive and correctly predict who’s going home next week again
The five remaining wannabes leave Macau and head for cosmopolitan Hong Kong. I’ve been there twice and think it’s a beautiful city but didn’t have fun either time. So going a third time isn’t high on my world travel plans. When the girls arrive, they learn a fight sequence which they have to act in a scene with international actor and pop star Nicholas Tse.
Once they’re done playing “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon“, the Final 5 soar to new heights much to the chagrin of some of the girls. They have to pose atop a high rise tower in extreme rain and wind. I feel for them because I have serious vertigo and probably couldn’t do it even if I was harnessed with fifty million straps. Not going to happen. Keep reading to see who I think will receive FCO and receive a one way ticket home via a junk boat.
Previously on America’s Next Top Model, we actually got a pretty reasonable episode considering all the nonsense Tyrant has been throwing our way lately. Seymone FINALLY got the boot after weeks of vapid mediocrity and we got to see all the girls model… like actually model. Not sure who brought the Dorchester Collection Fashion Prize into the mix (probably Kelly Cutrone), but it was awesome to see the wannabes compete with each other to open a collection. And then, we even got an original photo shoot courtesy of Hello Kitty. And, Sophie is on a roll! Maybe this Cycle could turn around! Yeah right. This week, they’re off to Asia. How many of the wannabes will actually know where Macau is? Will Tyrant make them speak Cantonese… or even Portuguese? Only 6 girls are left. Who will be eliminated tonight?
So this week, the wannabes are off to Macau and it made me think back to all the other international trips… the hits and the misses. Obviously, nothing will EVER top Milan when Shandi cheated on her boyfriend. That phone call is still one of the best moments in reality TV. She was the hottest of ANTM messes. Then there was the oh-so-foreign Maui for the midget cycle. That was definitely the worst. I hope we see some wannabes lost in translation!
Previously on America’s Next Top Model, the Brits continued on a comeback role as another American got the boot. This time it was the ever-boring and bug-eyed Kyle that failed to impress. The best part of the whole episode had to be listening to Tyrant pile compliments onto Seymone, because we all know how much Tyrant loves to pimp her pet projects, only to see that the fiercely real wannabe was a total disaster in every single background shot she was in. Amazing. Tyrant is clueless. Speaking of clueless… do you think Nigel, Mr. and Miss J saw the epic firing coming? More on that later. How will Tyrant manipulate the results this week? What annoyingly self-serving nonsense will Madame Ego bless us with? How many Cycles must we wait until Tyrant fires herself? Only 7 or something like that remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?
First off… supes totes sorry for being so late with this recap. Last week was crazy for me in the real world with work and stuff. You guys are all so awesome for coming back to this recap every week and I’m sorry I didn’t get it done sooner.
Now… Miss Tyrant. Can I get an UGH? What’s the female version of a douche bag? Seriously. You, your manipulations, and choice to steer ANTM away from modelling towards gimmicks and branding has cost you audience loyalty, credibility, and relevance. This latest stunt has everyone I know rolling their eyes and talking about moving on. Is it time? Are we there? I don’t know about all of you, but I’m pretty damn close to letting ANTM go. Sigh.