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antm cycle 16

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Previously on America’s Next Top Model, Tyrant subjected the wannabes to some seriously lackluster makeovers. And in one case, one the worst makeovers in ANTM history. Poor Molly got the world’s worst weave. Tragic comes to mind. The girls were then paired up for some group photo action. Some continued to impress, several fell flat, and one was bad enough to get the boot. Buh bye Dominique. I’m gonna miss your freckles. You know what I won’t miss? Kasia’s open-mouthed pouty face. She puts Trouty Mouth to shame in her pics. OMGlee! Ten girls whose careers are already over remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?

Today’s side note is brought to you by McDonald’s. I just wolfed down a big-ass shamrock milkshake on my way home from a late meeting. Damn that shit is good. Don’t judge. Tomorrow is St. Patty’s Day. I was celebrating. How do you think they get the shake that AMAZING colour of green? How many calories did I just consume? Wouldn’t it be fun to pour that green shit all over Tyrant’s weave? Bitch poured beer on my weave! Ahhh… memories. I miss Tiffany.

We start off this week with Alexandria in confessional saying she wants to redeem herself after Tyrant said she had a bad attitude. Redeem hard sister. Redeem hard. ‘Cause you’re a piece of work. Kasia then confesses that Alexandria should have been sent home, not given top photo because of her ‘tude. And the claws are out! Molly’s just scratching her nasty weave.

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I’m so excited and it’s not just because we have next week’s photos already. Photographer Francesco Carrozzini from Cycle 15 is back this week to work with the girls. Lucky beyotches. The Italian hottie will be directing the girls for their Mad Men retro-inspired commercials this week. Once again, the girls will be working in pairs. You can already taste the drama unfolding on your lips. Will Molly get her heinous weave fixed? Will Alexandria continue her reign of terror? Will Sara work out her new look?

Also in this episode, Miss Jay returns to give some runway tips. Dressed up in a yellow turban (LOL), he informs the girls about a fiery runway challenge which shocks the models. Silly girls. At this point, you know something crazy is always in store to test out their catwalk skills. If it’s not huge plastic spheres, swinging pendulums or a reverse conveyor belt, it wouldn’t be an ANTM challenge.

Going into this season, I didn’t think I was going to like it as much, but I’m pleasantly surprised. There are actually a few girls that could be working models. For once, it’s not super clear on who’s making it to the overseas trip. I’m really loving Mikaela, Molly, Jaclyn, Monique and Brittani. If they don’t make it, I’ll be pissed. Check out this week’s preview pics below.

check out more preview pics after the jump

ANTM Cycle 16 Episode 3: “Short Dutch Boy”

In: Rich, TV Shows

Previously on America’s Next Top Model, Tyrant put us through almost an entire hour of sob stories in the annual learn how to “emote” episode. All that crying got the best of Ondrei who, despite a gorgeous picture, quit at panel. Being away from her family was just too much for her. Ultimately, it was Hannah taking the top spot and Nicole getting the boot. I didn’t much care for so I’m glad she’s gone. Tonight is makeover night. Who will cry? Who will get the dreaded androgynous Tyrant chop-all-your-hair-off special? Eleven wannabes are left. Who will be eliminated tonight?

I just saw something on TV that says it’s Lent and that I should be giving something up to become a better person for Easter. I’ve put a lot of thought into it and decided that I’m not going to make fun of Tyrant… I mean Tyra… anymore. She’s a good person who does good things for good people in this good world. She deserves for respect for her work at being pretty and making up stupid terms. She deserves to be celebrated for what she has given this world. Peace. Glamour. Miss J. So how long is Lent anyways? 40 days! RYFKM?!?! Scrap that. Sorry Tyrant. You’re back on the shit list.

We start off this week not wasting any time with rehashing the previous panel. The girls get home and find a big string they’re supposed to pull. It unleashes a curtain with descriptions of the makeovers. It doesn’t say who is getting what, just adjectives like “Kinky, Red, and Wild with Matching Brows“. Let the fretting begin! But first, we have to listen to some serious screaming. The biggest concern seems to be “Short Dutch Boy“. What in God’s name is that? Tyrant should give up made-up nonsense for Lent!

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For all you hardcore ANTM fans, it’s your lucky day today. I have next week’s preview pics a day early for you. Not only do I have the pics from the next photo shoot, but the girl’s makeover pics as well, or should I say Ty-overs. Who will have an epic breakdown because of their new look? I can’t wait.

Photographer Pamela Hanson is in charge of snapping the girls this week, while respected fashion stylist, Lori Goldstein dresses them for their photo shoot and also sits on panel this week.

Are you guys loving ANTM this cycle? I’m on the fence on it. It hasn’t annoyed me yet, but hasn’t captured my full attention either. I’m still getting all the blond girls confused. Thankfully, one of them are gone now and I only need to remember Molly, Hannah and Alexandria. But since this is the makeover episode, I might have more or less blonds to differentiate depending what Tyra envisions for them all. If you can’t wait til next week, keep on reading.

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Previously on America’s Next Top Model, Tyrant launched her sixth season by scrapping the whole casting episode. It’s the best decision she’s made since Caridee won Cycle 7 in 2006. The wannabes moved into their new pad, screamed a lot, caused some drama and the had their first test of runway mayhem when they stomped it out inside plastic bubbles. Some girls fell, most of them looked ridiculous. The photoshoot was a good start for most of the never-gonna-become-an-acutal-supermodel contestants and saw Molly rise to the top of the pack. Some girl who I don’t even remember sucked more than the other sucky girl and was eliminated. Will the wannabes at the bottom be able to overcome shoddy first impressions? How many times with Tyrant say “fiercely real” and cause me to vomit a little bit in my mouth? 13 wannabes remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?

Ok. Here comes my standard ANTM recap off-topic second paragraph. You should be used to it by now. I blame Dan, Stephen, their boyfriends, and our friend Kieran for what is sure to be a meandering recap. After a long day, I rushed home from the office to get to my tax appointment at H&R Block. I NEVER do my own taxes. I hate forms. After that fun, Dan and Stephen were able to twist my rubber arm to head to our local gay pub for some beers. We joked about Plenty of Fish for a while and what it means to be “non scene” and “straight acting”. Does writing for a gay blog called HOMORAZZI eliminate me from those two profoundly meaningful characteristics? I hope so. Note to POFers… your’re gay. You like it you know where. You’re not “straight acting”. Rant over. Can someone please pass me the ahhLOOminiummm. Inside joke. Sorry. Ask Dan and blame the beer.

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ANTM Cycle 16 Episode 2 “Alek Wek” Preview Pics

In: Donovan, TV Shows

ANTM’s premiere of cycle 16 just aired a couple of days ago, but I’ve already got pics from the second episode. What did you think of the premiere? I’m so glad they got rid of the boring casting special. At first I wasn’t crazy about the behind the scenes photo shoot, but it grew on me. Wait til you check out this week’s set.

ANTM favorite, photographer Mike Rosenthal, returns to the show to take some beauty shots of the wannabe models. As you all know, Tyra likes to throw in a little something, something to make some of the girls freak out. I think this week, she’ll definitely succeed. Adding bees to the shoot can seem like a frightening thing, but the outcome is simply gorgeous. Nearly all the girls deliver some amazing photos. They’re truly “the bee’s knees“. Oh, and this week’s special guest panelist is supermodel Alek Wek. Hope you enjoy the preview.

check out preview pics from ANTM’s upcoming episode after the jump

What’s up wannabes. It’s Cycle 16 of ANTM. Stop and think about that for a minute. Did you ever think, way back in the days of Elise, Shannon, Robyn, and Adrienne, that we would ever get this far? Who knew Shandi’s iconic breakdown would still be one of the greatest moments in Reality TV history? Or how about Yaya and Eva going on to be successfulish actors? What about the lingering amazingness of Tyra’s freak-out on Tiffany, forever becoming TYRANT thereafter? Then we began to endure the revolving judging door as Tyrant’s ego blossomed out of control. Janice was out, Twiggy was in. Then Tyrant started her little trick of keeping fugly dramatic girls to push artificial storylines along. Remember Jade? Ugh. Or, how about Melrose? Then we started seing more and more mothers and other bullshit sob stories making it way too far. Hello Renee! But it wasn’t until Cycle 9 when we started getting the gimmicky winners. I’m talking about you Saleisha and Whitney! Then came the unbelievable talents who were robbed by Tyrant’s nonsense… Lauren Brie eliminated! Teyona beating Allison! It was Cycle 13 when Tyrant jumped the shark, but survived. We had a whole Cycle of small girls. It should’ve killed her, but was saved by a stunning winner in Nicole. Cycle 14 pretty much hit the bottom of the barrel with a trip to New Zealand and a ho hum cast. Thankfully, Cycle 15 breathed life back into the franchise with new prizes, better judges, and a focus on high fashion. So what will Cycle 16 be? Keep riding high? Or, a return to the mid-year slumps? Only one way to find out. Read on!

Did you see what I did there? Every cycle… had it’s own moment to shine. Impressive. Now on with the shitfest!

OK! This is actually funny. Tyrant is introducing the cycle. She’s making fun of the type of models that usually appear in an opening episode when they narrow it down to the finalists. Hilarious. I particularly love Angora Nylandra Tafatia Michaels. Someone please start calling me Tafatia. Then Goth Tyrant lashes out… “I’m not a cookie cutter, I cut the cookies, and I’m gonna cut you”. Too funny. Casting week is no more! The 14 girls are moving in tonight! Thank god. First, however, we have to endure a 5 minute set up of Tyrant punking the girls. She let the finalists think they had actually been cut. But they weren’t! Cue the screaming. Cue the tears. Cue the melodrama. Cue ANTM!

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Hello boys and girls. It’s time to bring out your ANTM dictionary and familiarize yourself with phrases like dreckitude, smizing, ty-overs and other crack like that, because Season 16, sorry Cycle 16, is upon us. Just like last year, we’ll be bringing you preview pics from the upcoming episode, days before it airs. So fasten your seatbelts. I’m sure it’s going to be a bumpy ride as always.

Just like the previous cycle, the girls will be competing for a contract with IMG Models, a fashion spread in Vogue Italia, a spread and cover of Beauty In Vogue, and a $100,000 contract with CoverGirl Cosmetics. Though this cycle isn’t coined “the high fashion one”, I think they’ll still be looking for a model that can work in international markets due to the fact, Italian Vogue Editor-in-Chief Franca Sozzani interviews the remaining girls like she did last year. Let’s call it like it is. She’s probably the one who picked Ann over Chelsey in the end.

This week’s one hour premiere will focus on the traditional casting special. The following pics I have, are actually from the next week’s one where the girls move into the house and start bitching each other out. American Model Erin Wasson pops up to give the girls some runway advice and to critique the ladies on the judging panel later. Check out the pics from ANTM’s first elimination episode below.

check out preview pics from episode 1 after the jump

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