Previously on America’s Next Top Model, Ann won best photo for the third time in a row after a STUNNING beauty shot. Rhianna got the boot and I’ve forgotten her already. The girls also managed to step up the drama after having a BORING party with some hot guys. They all turned on Kacey and she got all ghetto on their asses. Liz continued her whining ways and got on Jay’s last nerve. Can these two bounce back into the good graces? Can Ann continue her unprecedented streak? Who will be eliminated tonight? Wanna be on top?
We start off tonight with Ann celebrating her win. Kacey starts hating on her and tries to defend herself to a group of “bitches”. She calls a group meeting. Oh God. This never goes well. Remember when Robyn called a house meeting in Cycle 1. Elyse almost rolled her eyes out of her sockets! Oooooooh Jesus! They all write questions down on a piece of paper and answer them. Some juicy little tidibits spill out. Ummm… Liz? Really? Pregnant and in a homeless shelter? What kind of trash are you? Jane comes from a wealthy family and feels ostracized because she’s loaded.
Previously on America’s Next Top Model, Tyrant gave the wannabes makeovers and I praised the almighty that she stopped calling them “Tyovers”. Terra got her recently made over self booted halfway through the episode and Sara followed soon behind in a double elimination smackdown. Ann, the ugly pretty awkward girl with no waist, odd eyebrows, freakish height, and ZERO fashion sense won best photo for the second time. We have ourselves a frontrunner! Can the other girls catch up? Will Tyrant say something asinine? Does anyone else miss Miss Jay’s panel commentary? Who will be eliminated tonight?
We start of this week in the apartment with a series of confessionals with the girls talking about each other behind their backs. Surprise surprise… blah, blah blah. Then Kacey decides they should throw a little party and invite the male models from the most recent shoot. Ooooh. Interesting. Is someone gonna pull a Shandi? She’s got a boyfriend back home too. Uh oh. When the boys came, it was “mad awkward” as Liz put it. Kayla said it was worse than a middle school dance. I guess that’s what happens when there’s no booze allowed. The tumbleweeds roll in. Snoozefest.
Previously on America’s Next Top Model, Tyrant kicked off the competition with a lesson in self-esteem and body image. Obviously. Where would American girls be without Tyrant Banks! After a fairly lackluster photoshoot, apparent front-runner Anamaria got the boot. She was WAY too skinny… even for the cycle of high fashion. She was a bit of a cow, so I ain’t hating on Tyrant for that one. Crazy looking Ann emerged as the awkward one to beat. Can she get top photo two weeks in a row? Who will breakdown during the makeovers? Thirteen wannabes remain… who will be eliminated tonight?
We start off this week with Drew Barrymore talking about CoverGirl’s legendary bold lash blast bolder shade duo smoky shadowblast lashblast. Oops sorry. That was a commercial. That shit is crazy. I’d be really curious to see the market research on the CoverGirl campaigns. They throw so much tongue-twisting jargon and gimmicky slogans around in one commercial that it’s hard to follow. Any marketing folks want to chime in on this one? Lash blast away smoky shadow blast!
Previously on America’s Next Top Model, Tyrant introduced us to a whole new crop of wannabes. And you know what? Not a plus-sized girl among them. No fatties. No midgets. Just a busload of tall skinny girls with high fashion potential. Thank god. Can Tyrant really find the next couture sensation? Can she find that awkwardly beautiful diamond in the rough? Probably not. The only thing we know is that a bunch of waifs will scream, cry, yell at each other, and lust for Nigel Barker. Just like me! Who will be the first to go? Who will be America’s Next Top Model?
The title of this week’s episode is simply “Diane Von Furstenberg”. Saweet. Can’t wait to see her on the judging panel. Loved her on Project Runway. But first we have to get reacquainted with the 14 finalists as they move into their new pad in Venice Beach. Ugh. Back in California. This show is WAY better when it’s in NYC. Oh well. I’m actually kinda jealous of their new place. It’s gorge… AND they have a runway. I want a runway in my condo. Sigh. When I get married, there is going to be a runway. Walk off!
Here we go again. America’s Next Top Model is back. The catfights are back. The stereotypical casting is back. The bitchy blog is back. Tyra Banks is back, but that is the last time we will use her fake name here at Homorazzi. To me, she will always be Tyrant. Why? Because she is a ridiculous caricature, fake, transparent with her editing, and way too prone to stupid gimmicks. Despite all that… we love her. And, we love Top Model. Still. Here we are at Cycle 15 and the show has YET to produce an actual supermodel. A lot of the girls are working, but there has been no Adriana or Gisele or Agyness. Tyrant has never picked a high fashion winner… Jaslene and midget Nicole were close, but not the real deal. Could this year be different? Will Tyrant’s newfound love for high fashion finally give us a REAL model? Or are we destined to relive the CoverGirl slash Walmart slash Seventeen failures of the past? Who else misses Elyse? Sigh.
For all you hardcore ANTM fans out there, I bring you, your first look at America’s Next Top Model Cycle 15′s season premiere. I’m just heading out the door, and don’t have time to do a quick write up. Enjoy the pictures.
As previously speculated, “America’s Next Top Model” is trying to go all legit for Cycle 15. Tyra Banks is attempting to make ANTM go high fashion this go around. Sure, she’s made that claim before, but this time she has Andre Leon Talley in her corner. Sources say, he was instrumental in getting Italian Vogue and a group of well-respected fashion designers on board.
Instead of randoms on the judging panel, they’ve bagged some fashion heavyweights to take turns dwindling down the 14 model wannabes. Lauren Conrad and Whitney Port, I love you both, but you have no business on that panel. Signing on to judge and critique the ladies are Roberto Cavalli, Zac Posen, Diane Von Furstenberg, Margherita Missoni and Italian Vogue editor-in-chief, Franca Sozzani. Ann Shoket, you and your nose will be missed.. NOT.
I’m pleasantly surprised the CW released video interviews of the models instead of their heinous cast shots first. I think you’re able to better grasp their personalities and model potential this way. Remember last cycle, that awful 80s aerobic styling. Great for a theme party but not flattering at all.
Hometown: Dallas, Texas
She may look like Gollum’s long-lost sister, but that’s actually a good thing for this cycle. Ann’s tried to book an agency numerous times, but has been turned down for being too tall. Standing at a behemoth 6’2″, Ann also has the smallest waist in the world, according to the ANTM promos. Someone give this Gothic Lolita an In-N-Out burger immediately.