Random Reads

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the-millennial-bachelortte-fod

Joelle “JoJo” Fletcher began her quest for true love this week on the premiere of The Bachelorette Season 12. Is it me or does is look pretty damn obvious who she’s already fallen for? Thank God, I have Jordan in my fantasy pool 😉

Meanwhile, the OG JoJo, of “Too Little, Too Late” fame, pops up in the latest Bachelor spinoff- The Millennial Bachelorette. Before you get too excited Bachelor Nation, it’s not a real show, but rather a new Funny or Die spoof. The 25-year-old singer makes a special, and humorous, cameo in the clip.

The actual leading lady, though, is Keke Palmer who’s on the hunt for her one true, non-exclusive, soulmate. “Get ready for a summer full of unmet expectations and poorly communicated feelings, this season is definitely gonna hurt,” the video description states.

Check out the clip below. At long last, we finally have a non-white leading lady, albeit for a parody, but still, it’s a start.

watch after the jump

herdon-monument

For decades, plebes (freshmans) from the Naval Academy in Annapolis, Maryland take part in an annual tradition that provides some tasty eye candy. A bunch of shirtless men climb on each other to mount a tall phallic symbol that’s all greased up. Sounds like a regular Friday at the local bathhouse 😉

The Herndon Climb marks the end of plebe year for midshipmen. Together they must remove a ’Dixie cup’ hat from the top of the monument and replace it with an upperclassman’s hat. The best time of 43 minutes, 43 seconds was achieved by the Class of 1991.

This year’s, Class of 2019, failed to best that but served up a healthy portion of USDA Grade ‘A’ beef. Just in case you were wondering, their time was one hour, 12 minutes and 30 seconds. Check out all the action below.

watch all the sexy action after the jump

gwenyth-paltrow-goop

Can you put a price on self-pleasure? Apparently, you can. In Gwyneth Paltrow’s world, that’ll cost you about $15,000.

For Goop’s first-ever sex issue, the 43-year-old actress and her team have selected a wide range of pricey sex toys. The one getting the most notice is a 24-karat gold plated dildo from Lelo.com that costs about 15,000 USD. It also comes in stainless steel if gold isn’t your thing 😉

“For women who demand the ultimate in luxurious indulgence, this is the world’s most exclusive massager,” the description states

If you’ve ever wanted to see what a $15,000 dildo looked like, check it out below.

check it out after the jump

Beyonce’s Lemonade Recipe

In: Donovan, Random Reads
beyonce-lemonade-recipe

Where was this before Beyonce’s HBO special aired on Saturday? It would’ve definitely come in handy. Not that my store-bought frozen lemonade wasn’t tasty, but a homemade one from scratch would’ve no doubt impressed my guests. Especially if it was a recipe from Bey’s own grandmother.

Oh well, at least I can try it out for one of my upcoming gatherings this summer. Nothing goes down better on a hot summer day than some ice-cold lemonade, right? Check out the video recipe below.

watch after the jump

2016-new-merriam-webster-words

Merriam-Webster is getting with the times. About 2,000 new entries were added to the company’s unabridged dictionary recently. Some are definitely very millennial targeted.

FOMO (fear of missing out), ICYMI (In Case You Missed It) and TMI (too much information) were some of the text-friendly acronyms that made the list. Speaking of your smart phone, “nomophobia“- fear of being without access to a working cell phone also made the cut. See what other notable words and phrases are now included.

check out a few more after the jump

Harriet Tubman To Be New Face Of US $20 Bill

In: Donovan, Random Reads
harriet-tubman-us-money

There were rumblings that the $10 bill was getting a makeover. But due to the popularity of Broadway musical, Hamilton, and its creator, Lin-Manuel Miranda, winning the Pulitzer Prize this week, Alexander Hamilton will remain the face of the US $10 bill… for now.

Instead, it’s Andrew Jackson who’s being pushed aside. The United States Treasury Department announced Harriet Tubman will replace the seventh president on a new $20 note. It’s quite fitting that Tubman, an African-American who was instrumental freeing slaves via the Underground Railroad, kicks Jackson, who owned hundreds of slaves, to the curb.

Read the rest of this entry »

donald-trump-mean-girls

This is absolutely ridiculous and that’s exactly why it’s so hilarious.

Donald Trump is a lightning rod for controversy given all his politically incorrect comments and opinions. He’s pretty much a real life ‘mean girl.’ But how would the 69-year-old fare against the Plastics? Let’s just say, Regina George has finally met her match.

Check out the parody by The Crazy Gorilla below. If you love Mean Girls, it’s a definite must-watch. He did a fantastic job of integrating The Donald’s rhetoric into classic scenes from the teen flick.

watch after the jump

In honor of St. Patrick’s Day, I thought I’d rotate up this Marry, F*ck, Bitch Slap post featuring a trio of hot Irish studs originally posted back in 2012. It was long before people were lusting over Jamie Dornan in Fifty Shades of Grey. #justsaying

With a long list of sexy men hailing from Ireland including Cillian Murphy, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Daniel Day-Lewis, Pierce Brosnan and Stuart Townsend to name a few, narrowing it down to just three proved very difficult. There’s something very attractive about that charming Irish rogue these men possess.

In the end, I chose Colin Farrell, Michael Fassbender and Jamie Dornan to represent the rolling hills of Ireland. I’m sure you won’t complain about my choices. They’re all sex symbols and worth lusting after. Get to know the men in more detail below.

You know how the game works. Pick one to marry and live in wedded bliss with, and another to have a hot passionate one night stand with, while the other is the subject of your bitch slapping. Happy choosing everyone.

check out the men after the jump

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