Jonny

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Houston, We Have a Problem…

In: Behind The Cast, Jonny

houston-problem-ta-ta-for-now-cream-goodbye

Recently, my Texas ex from 5 years ago came to Vancouver for a “surprise” visit. It had been years since our break up and almost as long since we’ve connected.

Rewind to 5 years ago when I boarded a plane, that stopped down 3 times before it arrived at George Bush Airport (IAH) in Houston. I knew I had to do it, he had no clue. I kept hoping the aircraft wouldn’t be able to sustain being airborne, as a crash was about to happen either way. After deplaning, I waited to be the last one off….took the long walk down the arrivals hallways and was greeted with his big ol’ Texas grin.

I told him right then and then. He wasn’t the one.

He cried. I cried. He begged me to just fake it for the evening as his family planned a huge BBQ with relatives waiting for us to come back. I couldn’t do it, nor would I, simply to have the truth come out later. Could you imagine, people taking pictures of us and video cameras rolling as we sat there lying?? It’s like going back into the closet. I felt awful, my heart hung low and I tried so hard to keep it together while waiting to get back onto the next dreaded flight home. “The least I could do was break up with him in person” I thought to myself, a phone call or e-mail just didn’t seem right.

FFW to now, and seeing him… it was lovely. We talked about old times and got caught up on each other’s lives. But if I could go back in time, to that version of Jonny, waiting for that trip back home, I would tell him “I’m proud of you”. I made the right decision after all. Hard choices are sometimes the ones that truly set you free. Thank GAWD I listened to my soul and my inner truth. I couldn’t be happier with where the path has brought me today.

texas-conf-logo All My Exes Live In Texas

 

 

 

 

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Chris Brown – Bitch, Please!

In: Jonny, Music, Random Reads

Sean “P-Diddy”, “Puff Daddy”, “Pee-Idiot” Combs is a criminal!

pd1

(You’s a big fine woman won’t you back thadass up!)

Not only did he invite Rihanna and Chris Brown to vacation together in one of his homes near Miami Beach. Small Pee Pee Combs gave them “the time they needed to heal old wounds and forge together as one as they continue on their…..” blah blah blah.

Bull.

Weren’t there any gays in and around the Miami beach area that could’ve helped Rihanna pack up and leave? Maybe give Chris Brown some lessons on how NOT to hit a woman and start hitting Diddy for being a dildo…

P Diddy= Enabler! Criminal!

…bitch please

Last Night’s Hair

In: Fashion, Jonny

Tired of lookin’ like this fellas?

bad-hairAre you sick of having to “do your hair” everyday before you go to work? Have you ever woken up after a night out with your friends at the bar, stared into the mirror and thought “I look like ass, but my hair still looks great!”. I call that “LAST NIGHT’S HAIR” and I rock it all the time. Luckily for you, I’m willing to share the celeb style secret!

A few years ago, during a trade show event that I was working at on behalf of my radio station, I had the chance to have my “hair-did” by a “Stylist to the Stars”. The tips she gave me have stayed with me ’til this day. It’s especially great advice for us men who still have to flat ironflat-iron

 

 

 

  

 1) Wash, condition, blowdry hair

2) Flat iron dry hair in the direction that you ultimately want it to go (duh!)

3) For hair like mine (or as DVD one called it “Your hair is like otter hair, it’s so thick and dense!”) use a light palmade and finger style it. Remember product goes in the front AND back!

4) THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT FOR NDH: Using hairspray, give a good ‘once over’. Don’t over do it, but immediately, take your blow dryer, put it on the lowest setting and on ’cool’ for about 20 seconds. Allow your locks to “set” 

5) Go out, have fun, pick up a trick, go to bed as per usual. When you wake up, kick out your trick, grab a mirror and take a minute or two to ’freshen’ NDH again. I’ve fooled many, and often NDH looks better than FDH( first day hair)! Try it for yourself, and tell me what you think. Again, the “set it and forget it” step of hairspray and low heat is the key ingrediant. Happy Hair!ron1

Ron Popeil sets it and forgets it…

Nadya Suleman – Bitch, Please!

In: Jonny, Random Reads

Nadya SulemanOh get ready for this one!

Octo-Mom’s Dad is on Oprah today. Will he talk about the babies? His Angelina-Wannabe-clone-crazy-daughter? What about the foreclosure of their 2 bedroom house March 5th?

Don’t miss it,  The Wizzard of Dr. Oz talks with Doc Oct Nadya Suleman’s papa, Edward this afternoon!

…bitch please!

This is Cool!

In: Jonny, Music

Beyonce Single Ladies Video ContestEvery gay and his friends have tried their darnedest to do a live action version of Beyoncé’s hit, “Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)”. Drunk, lonely or just having fun, you could be rewarded handsomely for your fine dancing skills. Beyoncé has just announced a contest that you should know about.  Here’s the str8 goods: Fans can submit video of themselves dancing along to her “Single Ladies” routine. The winner will take home $2,500 . . . and their video will be shown during her upcoming world tour. Beyonce hits GM place Tuesday March 31st.

THERE IS A CATCH (No, Adam doesn’t have to be in the vid with you!! LOL). You can’t add ANY of your own choreography. Your performance must mirror the official dance that Beyoncé and her dancers do in the original video.

Show ‘em whatchu got by clicking here

Kanye West – Bitch, Please!

In: Jonny, Music, Random Reads

Kanye West Details MagazineOkay so I thought this might just be the best way to introduce myself on homorazzi and give a little perspective on how I see the world. Get ready for “…bitch please!”

Today’s “…bitch please” is courtesy of that douche bag Kanye West. Seems like he was yapping about how much he’s conquered the music scene and is ready to move on to….FRANCE! “Gay” Par-ee to be exact. He’s thinking about working with Marc Jacobs (who he claims is his ‘idol’), continuing the journey of saint-hood, to develop and market fashion for Louis Vuitton.

Keep in mind, our friend who rocks the ‘frollet’ (a mix between ‘fro’ and ‘mullet’) says that while he’s in love with “the gays”, it’s not like he’s going to a gay bar anytime soon.

…bitch please!

We heart(less) you, but keep your love lock “down-there” out of our clubs. Unless of course, you’re buying the dranks. PS…Word has it that “Paranoid” will be the 3rd single off 808′s and heartbreaks. Thank god. Or is it “Thank Kanye” these days?

The new issue of details, with all the dirty deets on Kan, hit store shelves this week.

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Jonny Staub