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In: Behind The Cast, Jonny

When I was 15 years old I came out to my sister Rachel. Her best friend Laura was a lesbian and I felt that Rach would be the most understanding. Surely, she would tell me that everything was going to be okay, and help me in the process of telling Mom, Dad and the rest of the family. It just so happened the day I told her, she had something to tell me.
“Me Too.”
In a role reversal, there we stood in our green bathroom…a bit stunned. I remembered the times we had been bowling and she would say to me “Stop acting like such a f_ggot!.’ At the time, it hurt my feelings and wounded my sense of masculinity. The sadness subsided when I knew that she too would bare that early coming out cross.
Through the years, and with much research, I’ve found that this is more common (having a gay sibling) than not. I’ve had friends, previous boyfriends and even read magazine articles that revealed that we weren’t alone. Gay brothers, gay sisters…heck one of my ex’s came out to his Dad and right then and there his Dad came out to him and introduced his son to his long term partner.
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Criminal Names

In: Jonny, Random Reads

Well this is just such a “bitch please” moment for me. I’m not sure if this is acurate or not, however it may help you on your search to find a husband. A good husband who isn’t a schmuck or a criminal. At least, not by his name!

A study from Shippensburg University in Pennsylvania has found that the more unpopular, uncommon or feminine a boy’s first name is, the more likely he is to become a CRIMINAL.

If you’re wondering WHY this is the case, it’s because people tend to make fun of boys with unusual names, or discriminate against boys with names that SOUND as if they come from a poor family.

Anyway, here are the ten names which are most likely to turn your son into a criminal:

alec-baldwin#10) Alec
ernest-p-world#9) Ernest

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8 Great Sex Tips

In: Jonny, Sports & Health

I was always encouraged to read the newspaper growing up. To this day, I am happy that it was instilled in me at an early age, as a recent article in the Vancouver Sun hit the nail on the head when it comes to great sex. Sex….almost everyone does it. Gay or Straight, male or female…..old people do it, animals do it, and sometimes I like to just “do it” with myself in the shower. We all WANT to have great sex. But that begs the question: How do you get it?

Well, a psychologist and sexologist named Peggy Kleinplatz conducted a study to find the answer to that very question. She’s identified the eight key components of an amazing sex life. Listen up . . .

#1.) Focus: If you’re distracted, you won’t be “in the moment” . . . and that’s going to throw off your enjoyment. So it’s not enough just to BE there. You have to focus, and be ‘present.’

#2.) Connection: According to Peggy’s report, quote, “the depth of the connection between partners is one of the most critical elements of the experience, regardless of duration of the relationship.”

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Next Big Thing: DRAKE

In: Jonny, Music

Get ready to be singing this hook over and over all summer long: “Baby you the best, baby you the best… best I ever had…”

I am a huge R&B fan. Growing up outside of Detroit (AKA Windsor, ON) I was fortunate enough to have early exposure to Hip Hop, Rap, Old Skool jams and my all time favourite RnB.

Commonly as a youth, Anita Baker and DeBarge were heard in my home (at least while Dad was at work). Mom was a fitness instructor and would plan out her aerobics while I played the role of ghetto blaster DJ. I’d sit on the floor rewinding music clips that she would teach the class, get the next cassette tape ready and such. I worked for candy, part time doing this from the ages of 5-8.

But, I digress (it’s the Rose Nylund in me).

Fast forward to this past weekend’s MMVA’s, which my radio station sent me to cover and escort contest winners. In the press room, I was able to be a part of the “circuit”, where performers/stars like Lady Gaga, Black Eyed Peas, Perez Hilton, Audrina Patridge, Brody Jenner, and Girlicious all came through for interviews (the Jonas Brothers were too busy hosting the show).

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Book Review: Are You There God? It’s Me Chelsea

In: Jonny, The Arts

Funny. Light. Smart assed. Sensational.

All 4 of these words convey how I feel about the supremely talented Chelsea Handler. Chels (as I call her, pretending like I ACTUALLY know her) is the star of her own TV show on the E! Network called “Chelsea Lately”. She is also the woman I dream of working with one day and also having as my best friend.

Until that day arrives, I’ll have to settle for her latest book, entitled “Are You There Vodka? It’s Me, Chelsea“.

With summer here and every weekend booked, it’s time to get a hard cover to take along with you. Beach time, pool time, Grandma’s birthday party at the home! It’s a rare sight to see me laugh out loud with a book in my right hand, and zero liquor glass in the other. Heck, I barely laugh out loud when reading in general. However this light hearted, often silly and easy read has tears strolling down my face. Her antics, suggestions and storytelling are nothing short than brilliant.

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Interracial Dating: Statistics

In: Jonny, Politics & Issues

My first girlfriend was black. Not just a ‘friend’ that was a ‘girl’, but a girl who I made out with. I was a young lad who answered “YES” on a piece of paper that Marlena (not her real name, just one I stole from DAYS OF OUR LIVES) gave to me as an option on whether or not I liked her and wanted to be her boyfriend. It was grade 6, and during recess, the kids who were “boyfriend/girlfriend” would meet on the center spot on the field and “french kiss” in front of their peers.

Marlena was the first girl I ever kissed with tongue and I enjoyed her big, full lips. She was funny, athletic, out-going and could dance like nobody’s business. I liked the black girls throughout middle school and high school. They would often call me ‘whack’ and normally made the first move (which was better for me, because I was sexually shy.) Plus, over the span of one weekend Jodie’s Marlena’s hair could grow faster than mine in a year. It was only later that I found out that this was purely possible through the magic of her weave (here I thought black hair grew more rapid, and would cause us to be poor due to ongoing, weekly haircuts.) 

The funny thing is, after I turned to the cock, my feelings for the hot chocolate kind stopped with women. Don’t get me wrong, I have male friends, who happen to be black. I’ve just have never wanted to jump their bones (okay, unless your name is Kerry Rhodes) …Mmmmm now that brother is FIIIIIIINE!

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Kristin Rakes It In

In: Jonny, Random Reads, TV Shows

Bitch, Please! Do you realize just how much the “stars” on The Hills are worth??? According to “Life & Style” magazine, MTV has agreed to pay KRISTIN CAVALLARI $63,000 . . . per episode . . . to join the show next season. Ooooooh get ready for fall y’all!

A so-called “production insider” says, quote, “They needed her. The Hills ratings were on a decline. They needed someone new and fresh, who also came with buzz and a name that was recognizable. Kristin was the obvious choice.

Kristin is essentially replacing LAUREN CONRAD, who was reportedly pulling down $65,000 per episode. There’s no word how much SPENCER and HEIDI PRATT are making . . . but surely it has to be even MORE than that.


This year’s tryouts for the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders squad will include a quiz on current events and geography. Smart and pretty? Ooooh this sounds good!

Let’s be honest for a sec….the first ‘B’ word that comes to mind when it comes to the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders isn’t ‘BRAINS’ (anyone else think ‘Boobies’??).

So I was surprised to learn that this year’s tryouts for the Dallas Cowboys cheerleading squad includes a test covering the Cowboys football team, the cheerleaders’ history, the NFL and current events.

I know what you’re thinking. Why would a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader need to be up on current events?

Well, according to the director of the Cowboys cheerleaders, quote,

“We’re obviously looking for dynamic performers, but there’s so much involved in this job that has nothing to do with dance. That’s why we have to take a more wide-ranging approach in the audition.”

After laughing at the thought of these girls in their mini outfits sitting at desks, twisitng gum and thumbing their temples I decided to take the quiz for myself. Sadly, I’m not cut out to be a Dallas cheerleader :(

However, with my failure comes a chance for YOU to shine. Are you up for the challenge? (No googling/cheating)


1.) Name the Cowboys legend who served as head coach for the team’s first 29 years.

2.) What was the Cowboys’ first season in the NFL?

3.) Who is commissioner of the NFL?

4.) Name one country that borders Iraq.

Answers after the jump. Click here

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Jonny Staub