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“Home Movie”: A Flick to Make You Flinch!

In: Adam, Videos
home-movie-thriller

Realizing that I’ve been “all about my movies” these days, I feel I should explain it’s kind of a celebration of my finishing my first year: to veg and catch up on all those random movies I never had time for previously. Since anyone who knows me knows I’m basically non-stop viewing the latest releases, what this new found free time means is hitting up the randoms of the bunch, and this latest one is definitely on that list. Without even a single review on Rotten Tomatoes- no easy feat- “Home Movie” is more than just some grad student’s film school project: this flick has some names and a serious script to back it up. Staring Cady McClain (I know, who the hell is that… she’s a soap star from “All My Children” and “As the World Turns”), wait don’t click away yet!! This one also has “Heroes” sexy star (and husband of the Dixie Chicks lead singer- I can’t believe she beat me to him!) Adrian Pasdar who brings both his toothy, warming grin to a role that requires some extreme emotions as he bounces from manic to depressed, through drunk and back to hopeful again… before he lands in terrorized that is.

Accurately titled, “Home Movie” is a collection of personal, family moments caught on tape by the shutter-bug pastoral father of his young blond boy and girl and his gorgeous, doctor of a wife. As time progresses, we- and the couple- realize that more and more, these kids ain’t alright. I know what you’re thinking: the children are crazy, the parents are blind to it, let’s just fast forward to the “Hostel” scene… but if that were the case, I wouldn’t have bothered you with this. The film is essentially a mix of “Strangers”, “Blair Witch” and “Children of the Corn” as we are horrified in every clip, watching the father catches his “family at their best.” But, where’s the hook you ask?

Click through to see this spooky-ass trailer!

sunshine-movie

Sitting at home, pre-recuperating before a night of drinks, hockey, Club 560 debauchery and then more drinking, I decided to pop in an old favourite. Of course by “pop in” I mean download an 8GB bluray version of a fav sci-fi: “Sunshine”. This movie came out in 2007 and didn’t exactly explode on the big screen but certainly had a strong cult following… NOW, before you click away assuming “cult following” is a term reserved for movies like “Texas Chainsaw” and “Apocalypse Now”, know that this flick has a cast of young heavy hitters and graphics and a thriller soundtrack to back up this now stop ride into space and insanity… sounds good right? 😉

Stocked with “Fantastic Four’s” fantastically sexy Chris Evans, sexy (but not at all my type) “Red Eye’s” Cillian Murphy and “Damages” tv’s best understated scheming bitch du moment Rose Byrne, this movie is led into battle by “28 Days Later’s” director Danny Boyle so you know it’s gonna be a spooky one! Basically, it’s years in the future and the sun is dying so Earth’s last chance is to send a team of scientists (a bit sexier than probably populates the current staff at NASA) to the sun with a special bomb to explode our big yellow star into a newborn one that will heat the world for years to come. Of course, something happens mid-flight and the movie turns from nerd-venture into freaky-deaky explorations of the insanity of the human psyche. This is one to watch!!
Click through to catch the trailer for this gorgeous film

grindr-app-screenshot

As you may or may not know, with a little help from a local bartender about a year ago, I was early to jump aboard the Grindr craze as it swept our sexually rambunctious country. Not wanting to go through that ridiculously laboured effort to create ANOTHER online profile, upload 9 pics, describe myself in 400 words, consider my perfect first date and wait a couple days to be confirmed as a “real person”, the Grind option to set up my sex-searchin’ “nic and pic” in less than a minute was monstrously appealing. Feeling much the same, homos in Vancouver and from there virally (pun intended 😉 across the globe began downloading this app like crazy and the creators now boast over an astounding 500,000 users on there today! BUT, with that expansion and wide-spread acceptance, so comes greater scrutiny and responsibility.

Likely realizing that merely clicking “Yes, I am over 18” as you download and install this app doesn’t exactly fulfill all legal requirements of pseudo-porn distribution to the masses, the boys at Grindr have instituted a strict new set of rules concerning the viewable content we can post. The changes affect both the main pic we use to bait the boys with and the sometimes sexy self-description we type up to accompany it. Where originally waving your engorged peter around was about the only thing you could do to raise a red flag with the boys in tech support, there’s now a list of no-no’s that’ll get your words or pictures yanked. Don’t worry, you’re not getting “banned for life,” but the delay in gettin’ your new and “approved” picture up might unfortunately be the difference between you catching that 450 feet away “musclejock45” before the boy around the corner from you snatches him up. Read on to find out exactly what’s kosher and what’s not to properly set up/adjust your profile…. some of the new rules are actually pretty hilarious 😛

Click through to read the newest Grindr laws and my take on em!

southpark-facebook-chat-roulette

While there are a few shows I continue watching because I’m X many years in and can’t stop now (“CSI”, “Chuck”, “Dexter”), there are also those that retain my admiration and adoration throughout: “Seinfeld”, “Lost” and especially “South Park”. Constantly feeding off the latest celeb scandals, international news and technological advancements, “South Park” is one of the more malignant comedies out there that stay both current and smart without giving into the temptation of resting upon their established laurels. This Wednesday, they aired their latest episode (season 14 episode 04): “You Have 0 Friends”, and it was E-P-I-C!!

Admitting the course of television probably hasn’t been altered forever after (à la season finale of “Six Feet Under”), the relevance and contemporary value of this baby is too perfect for words. Basically, the boys are sudden Facebook obsessors as they struggle to amass more and more friends (PATRICK!!!); cultivate their Farm Town; and maintain real friendships through non-stop pokes and friend adds. Seemingly an easy joke to make, the writers really take this episode to an all time high level as we see everything wrong with Facebook (and later in the episode Chatroulette) as the boys are nearly broken up with for not immediately altering relationship statuses, condemned for adding “unattractive facebook friends” and forced by their parents into “poking their grandmas.”
Click through to see the best quotes and clip of the episode itself

Gay Top Model: Finale TONIGHT!

In: Adam, Totally GAY!
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Well, as the old adage goes: if you can’t say anything nice. So, following that logic……………………….
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Hahaha, oh calm down queens. As much as this project is offered as a gay, local version of the REAL “America’s Next Top Model”: don’t poke the animals, cause they will bite! Having experienced more S&M the night of my 26th birthday than any of the girls could inflict with their recently mani-eed french tipped nails (and angry, tearsoaked emails), I’m here one more time to “consider” the newest photo release (at the top of this article) and give my prediction for the night of the big show.

Click through to read my bitchiness and guess on “model” placement

the-life-and-times-of-tim

On my deathbed there’s a few names I’m going to curse and a couple I’ll mention as the best sex of my life, but mostly I’m going to be remembering and spoutin’ out “some of my favorite things” [insert a sing-song voice there]. And, HBO is hella near the top of that list. Coming out with amazing programming like “True Blood”, “The Sopranos”, “Six Feet Under”… did you know they had cartoons as well? Similar to the rest of their constantly A+ offerings, the 10$ budget comedic cartoon: “The Life & Times of Tim” is hands down one of the greatest things on television right now. A show about a 30-year old dude living in New York, working pay check to pay check at an awful job with insane coworkers and living in near-squalor with his sometime “voice of reason” and “sometime total crazy bitch” girlfriend, Tim is the quintessential everyman who makes bad decisions and pays for them every time.

Realizing this intro doesn’t exactly SCREAM originality, it is definitely a “have to see it to believe it” situation: this show will have you hooked by the second episode and is easily downloadable so no excuses for it being too late to start now. Only two seasons in, the show airs Sundays, 10PM on HBO and I promise, promise, promise you’ll love it. If you don’t, it’s because you’re stupid. Plot lines span from suicide packs between the protagonist and hot pharmaceutical sales reps to convincing a 10 year-old, mustached Bosnian girl to become a stripper. I’ll throw a couple great youtube clips for you to check out here so you can decide for yourself!

Click through to see the clips

gay-top-model-vancouver-underwear-men-shirtless

Here we go again. Homorazzi is back to review the latest updates on the “models” as they pose for a new photo shoot, some Behind the Scene videos and (yikes) self-written mini-bios. Having endured the slings and arrows of death threats (okay, more like “I’m gonna give you the rong [sic] foam next time you come into the Starbucks I’ve been working at for the last 6 years if you make fun of my bf one more time” threats ;), I’m back and ready to give the straight talk on the boys’ latest profile updates. Struggling to keep up with the myriad of new content Mirateca has been putting out (be reasonable on Terry, I have a lot of hangovers to deal with and the team of Jewish writers I have coming up with this stuff doesn’t come cheap!), I’m doing my best to catch up folks, so be patient! I’ll get around to laughing fairly considering everything eventually, so don’t fret.

The first year of this competition revolved around a pseudo-reality tv-show style, while my round was an abundance of live show performances and speeches (the only reason I got any votes outside my paid friends I’m sure of it ha)- whereas this year has gone completely digital and opted instead to pour out a ton of internet postings of numerous photo and video shoots to show us the boys. In an attempt to let us know what we’re paying for, the producers at Gay Top Model have recently given us a less photoshoped and edited version of the would-be-models, and, I’m sure I’m not the only one thinking this, but for more than a couple, I’m afraid I’m gonna have to ask for my money back. I’ll be reviewing the front/back/side profile shots at the bottom of the boys’ profile pages done in “Polaroid” style where little make up is worn (and even less clothing) as well as the mini-story they write about themselves/their day and finally the Behind the Scene videos where the boys are mostly caught in various states of undress, giving us an occasionally unfortunate look into the mannerisms and let’s call it “voice styles” of some of the lovely ladies. Here we go!

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Man Up BC! Give Me Cheap Booze!

In: Adam, Travel & Leisure
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As I plan for my trip down to Seattle this weekend, I take a quick second to check out the restaurant/bar we’ll be boozing at for our friend Chris’ 30th, and was annoyed to find out that the venue we’re taking over boasts a great deal on liquor and appies during their EIGHT HOUR “Happy Hour”.

I know, why should that anger me? Because the LST (Liquor Sales Tax) obsessed goons of the restaurant and bar businesses in Vancouver rarely if ever offer the same deals up here. One of my friends’ absolute favourite part about the occasional jaunts down South (other than the slew of boys we’ve never tapped) is the offer of painfully cheap booze and food. You Americans may not get your politics right a lot of them time, but god damn you know how to make Bacchic gorging affordable! I’m sure fellow writer Nic is the most pained as a wine-lover and not just because of the copious varietals offered at your local Ralph’s grocery store, but because of how CHEAP their prices are in comparison to our costly “import fees” up here grrr. And, for those youngin’ too newborn to have seen shows like Cheers and the “parent scenes” from Dawson’s Creek, “Happy Hour” is a time usually around 4PM till about 6 or 8PM offering near half-price deals on beer, cocktails and sometimes appetizers. The name is actually an understatement for how great you feel by the time you get the bill: both because of the tiny number on it and because of how drunk you get attempting to pound 5 Bud Lights by the time 6PM rolls around 😉

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