Another day, another desperate load of kids hoping to make it big. Maybe Colorado will actually offer us some real contenders this time around for the winners circle! Thus far, as you can read from my reviews, I’ve been pretty unimpressed with the “best singers” as chosen by the judges: good looking, sappy stories and begging seems to be the key to making through to the second round. I need me some ORIGINAL sounds and unique personalities and so far, short of one or two girls I’ve mentioned in past articles, I haven’t seen that star yet.
So, it’s time to try out Aspen. Also, really? Aspen? I’m sure it’s not, but I have this image of a tucked away snowy town that’s only accessible by one, rocky road… I know that makes no sense, but how did the infamous ski slopes of Asp get chosen? I’m honestly starting to question that there isn’t some weird marketing or cross-promotion thing going on behind the scenes but who really cares. Let’s get to what you’re here for: me complaining about the awful auditions.
Well, another city, another 10,000 “hopefuls” fill the audition room in what is quickly becoming my favorite city in the US. – San Diego. Famous (in my opinion) for its perfect weather and amazing gay pride, I’m just hoping that it also holds some talented folks and some epic crazies as Lopez and Tyler (ugh and Seacrest) tease and gel their hair as high as it will go for these Cali residents. Last night’s auditions took place on a jet carrier or something random like that: not REALLY sure what that’s about other than a blatant attempt at faux nationalism but oh well.
No spoilers before the fold, don’t worry, but I will say that the show is really editing down the insanity this season and particularly this episode as we pretty much just see success stories: I guess they’re doing some polling and finding out what people want to see… though, come on, at least ONE tragic queen spitting at the camera or a sassy gal with more extensions than real hair and the three inch lacquered nails to match. Ah well, it was a decent episode: if you’re looking to save time read the summary and see the highlights alone or if you’re looking to see me trash a bunch of “singers” click through for that as well!
Well, Idol survived my first review of the premiere attempt to scour for talent in the Southern heat of Savannah, Georgia, but will the City of Champions (in their first ever AI audition) match up in talent and entertainment? I’m hoping for at least one screaming queen (you know I hate how they represent our people but it’s still hilarious to see them bust down time after time and call momma to tell her she can’t quit the factory quite yet), one proposal from a bumpkin’ to Lopez and a few rants to the camera afterwards- oh, and a “true talent to take it all” blah blah blah. Honestly, it’s the bipolar ones that you need to look out for on this set!
Last night I decided to take off the kid’s gloves since I realized my original article was way too forgiving of over-produced Idol moments, stretched out dramas and barely-there voices that have no real chance to make it but that the “Golden Ticket Moment” is too much of a seller that they couldn’t resist passing them out like so many flavored tic tacs. So, buckle in, cause mean Adam is back and I’m taking no prisoners today!
Well, despite a god awful teaser of Lopez… well, walking… Season 11 of “American Idol” didn’t fail to have some classic AI, entertaining moments as we kick off the season in (do they always start here??) Savannah, Georgia. Home of the extremely young and talented, the gayest of the gays and way too many Steven Tyler fans, though that’s probably just because Georgia- like Australia and India- is about 20 years behind and is only just now hearing about this crazy new rock band called Aerosmith. All together though, they make for a pretty interesting opening show.
While many choose to skip over the auditions and hold out for Vegas week or even “Top 20s” (or whatever random number they go with this year), I’m a beginning to end kind of guy as I love to pick my faves early in the competition though typically the true stars don’t shine till they hit Sin City. You might notice that Donovan is no longer the welcoming face at the top of this article, well, we unanimously came to the decision that since the show is taking on a “kinder image” with Lopez and Tyler falling in love with every fresh face that hits the stage, we’d hit back by having our bitchiest writer- me- take the reins on the reviews. And speaking of…
Once again, in my unending search for the perfect, unheard of indie I’ve uncovered a pretty good gem amongst the typical flotsam and jetsam of low-bug, handheld student flicks. Today we look at: “Another Earth“.
Recently I wrote about the much more famed piece “Melancholia” which was backed by huge names like Lars Von Trier, Kirsten Dunst and Kiefer Sutherland. It looked at the psychological crumbling of a bipolar princess as her loved ones struggled to keep her sane while a giant planet came crashing towards the Earth. An interesting melange of themes and scenarios, “Another Earth” is not too dissimilar. In our indie, we follow a brilliant and beautied ex-con after she does her time for drunken vehicular manslaughter. Though the typical approach to this story would have her life post the big joint viewed as tragic and difficult, in this movie there is a familiar but unique twist that suddenly a parallel Earth has appeared next to our own and seems to have nearly identical inhabitants leading nearly identical lives… Okay, it sounds a BIT hokey, but I promise “it gets better”!
First off, let’s make this official: this isn’t Tommy’s “I loves me a diva” or Donovan’s “I can appreciate a classic” version of X Factor US, this is mine. I’m fellow writer Adam and for the most part people either hate or hate my reviews so let’s just get that straight right away cause I will be pulling no punches this evening for my (succinct I promise) recap of yesterday and today’s finale of X Factor US. Dono is away at his handsome hubby’s family Xmas thing and Tommy is glued to her eBay screen hoping Elizabeth Taylor’s jewellery somehow ends up back on sale so for now, you’re stuck with me ;)
I’m writing this article as the show occurs and hope to have it up and ready to be pummelled by unfortunate Chris Rene fans by the time the glitter falls on our winner ;) Tonight we were “lucky” to be graced by the famed likes of Justin Bieber, Stevie Wonder, Leona Lewis, Ne-Yo, Pitbull and (are you kidding me, “I hate gays”) 50 Cent. But, what you came here for is the RESULTS!! Also, me bitching super quickly about the missteps of last night so without further adieu…
Fresh from watching German vamp-thriller: “We Are The Night”, I became nostalgic for some previously viewed and equally disturbing germanic productions. What immediately came to mind was the powerful psychological thriller “The Wave”. From the same director Dennis Gansel, this piece instead looks at a famous American novel of the same name based on a German experiment from the the 60s set to test if Nazism (an abhorred political movement) could see a resurgence among impressionable students simply by calling their conduct and approach by a different name. This film is pretty damn epic.
First off, get the subtitled version: anything else is just cheating. Second, take a second to appreciate the hot daddy lead character and teacher to the students: it’s okay, you’re suppose to feel funny down there. Third, get ready to cringe cause the realism and terrifying plausibility of this movie as one by one the kids get swept up by the militant and unifying power of national socialism in a high school setting.
I officially have a new favorite show. In the pained hiatus during which we true tv-philes have been awaiting the return of cartoon brilliance “Archer”, there has a arisen a new shinning star onto the FOX network lineup: “Allen Gregory“. It is modern, hilarious, simply drawn and insanely well-written. Oh, and the voices… my god the voices.
Assembling a motley crew of some of the best voice actors out there, this show includes Jonah Hill of “Superbad” fame as the protagonist Allen Gregory, Will Forte and Nasim Pedrad from “Saturday Night Live”, “Party of Five” fave Lacey Chabert (clearly making up for skipping out on the role of a lifetime as Meg from “Family Guy”) and to a less exciting extent “3rd Rock From the Sun”‘s French Stewart. Iconic voices aside, it is the writing that brings this show to life. Created by Jonah Hill himself, this 22-minute cartoon will have you busting a gut from opening credits till close. Gay dads, nouveau-pauvre New York elite, condescension and racist humour out the ying yang, “Allen Gregory” can do no wrong in my eyes.