Washington DC - CapitolAnd so begins the first, long-awaited posting from Jake, AKA Ginger Snaps….

As of Wednesday, it will have been exactly eight weeks since I left my lifetime home of Seattle to seek out adventure and new professional opportunities. And while my time here has been brief, I have some bits of wisdom acquired from the locals to impart upon you all…

Transplantation and Acclimation: Tips for Surviving Gay DC

No One is Ever Going to Meet You Anywhere Outside the NW

For those of you who aren’t in the know, DC is divided into four geographic quadrants, NW, NE, SW and SE. The gaybourhoods, Dupont Circle, Logan Circle and the U Street Corridor are all located in the NW, as are most of the bars. But occasionally, a random friend will invite you out to a new hot club in the NE or a chill lounge on the East Hill. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT fall for it. Essentially, it’s like someone saying to come out to Kitsilano (sorry Saleem) for a rockin good time. These offers will only bring you lame times with sketchy Metro rides.

Remember, There Are Hot Republicans

Having grown up in the liberal bastion of America that is Seattle, gay Republicans are few and far between and attractive ones are an even greater rarity. But in DC there are a shockingly high number of Log Cabins, whose love for Sarah Palin is surpassed only by their distain for universal healthcare and the separation of church and state. And while you may not want to date someone so terribly unenlightened, for those of you boys planning a visit to my/our nation’s capital, try to keep your evil socialist views in check until you’re sure he isn’t driving you home in a SUV plastered with PALIN 2012 stickers.

Do Not, Under Any Circumstances, Go To TOWN on a Friday Night—

TOWN is DC’s local dance bar, with two stories of dance floors, one featuring top 40 tunes and the other with a more trance/house vibe. It tends to be the end of the road on the average Saturday night. But Friday night is a whole different ball game. Unbeknownst to me, Friday is 18 and over night. Walk into the bar and you find an entire dance club littered with shirtless teens, wasted from too much pre-gaming, hanging around the necks of their brand new father-figure/trick. Essentially, an entire club full of Adam and his latest “boyfriend.”