The Hills Final Season Episode 9 Recap & Parody: “Ryan And I, Like Really Broke Up”

In this, the 99th episode of The Hills, we’re treated to some cat fights, cupcakes, and cameramen. That’s right, for the first time ever, you can see a cameraman in the last scene of the episode…but we’ll get to that later.

The episode starts out at La Provence. Kristin, Lo, Stephanie, and Audrina are talking about Audrina leaving Ryan’s concert. She explains that she had made a metal list and that it makes sense for them to not be together. In other news, it’s almost her birthday and it’s time to plan a party where some drama will go down… on a boat! Last time this happened, Heidi showed up uninvited to Lauren’s birthday, which she was less than thrilled about. “All the usual friends,” are invited.

Next, Stephanie, Lo, and Kirstin decide to go shopping for Audrina’s but instead of deciding on whether to go in on a dress or jewelery together, they end up talking about inviting Justin. Lo is concerned about the idea, of course, but as she put it, “The thing about him is if you don’t invite him he shows up, and if you do invite him, he doesn’t show up. So let’s invite him.” So it’s decided.

Now to the boys, hanging at Surfside Beach. Brody, Taylor, and Frankie talk chicks. “Speaking of chicks, Mckaela’s out of her mind,”says Brody, talking about her being friends with Allie. “She’s still hot,” adds Frankie. Brody agrees, saying, “She can still be in the rotation.” As Brody leaves the two boys to go surfing, Frankie says, “Brody’s such a bitch.” Haha – took the words out of my mouth. Can’t stand Brody.

Now for some serious drama at MyHouse. All the boys and girls are out – even Holly (who doesn’t say two words). The drama begins when Allie and McKaela show up. Allie walks over to Kristin to try and discuss what’s going on and why Kristin has such hatred for her. This next photo explains what she said next:

They proceed to keep fighting, Kristin is totally hammered and not making any sense. Allie walks off, deciding that Kristin was a delusional crazy person.

The next day, Kristin comes to meet Lo at Smashbox Studios. Lo isn’t at her desk, but McKaela is there. They discuss the previous night’s happenings when Lo walks in. Basically, it ends with Kristin warning McKaela to stay the hell away from her.

Next up, we take a cruise in Audrina’s Mercedes SUV all the way over to Ryan’s house for Happy Hour. Ryan wraps up doing the dishes by hand to have a serious discussion about his and Audrina’s relationship. In the end, Audrina breaks up with him.

Later on, Kristin meets up with her last season’s flame Justin Bobby at Desert Rose. They’re both wearing cut off-sleeves. Weird. Kristin invites him to Audrina’s birthday.

The next day at Kristin’s house, Audrina comes over to tell Kristin the news: “Ryan and I, like really broke up.” Kristin responds by is putting flowers out and telling her that Justin Bobby still likes her and is coming to her bday.

Time for Audrina’s 25th birthday! At Marina Del Ray, everyone gets on the sailboat and away they go. Everyone, including Justin Bobby, are there. The ship is sailed by Fred the ship captain. Everyone loads up on booze, while Stephanie Pratt drinks a mini Costco Kirkland water bottle. Over candles & cupcakes, the crew decide to plan a trip to Costa Rica for the next episode – in an effort to hide from Allie and McKaela. Later on, Audrina and Justin Bobby have a romantic conversation on the deck alone. Well, not so much alone. Check out the shot of the cameraman visible by the other cameraman’s shot. Hilarious!

And a closeup for you…

Songs Featured During This Episode:

  • Travie McCoy – Dr. Feel Good
  • We The Kings – In-N-Out (Animal Style)
  • The Good Life – Kanye West
  • John Mayer – All We Ever Do Is Say Goodbye
  • Little Boots – Remedy
  • Portrait of a Friend – Hollywood Love Story
  • The Ruse – Perfect World