The debut of Ali Fedotowsky as the newest bachelorette is less than a week away. Last minute promotions have kicked into overdrive and high gear. With The Bachelor franchise doing better than ever, the producers have spared no expense with this season. This year’s reality courtship will take place in rumored exotic locales such as Iceland, Turkey, Portugal and Tahiti. How did Ali get so lucky?

I thought it would be the perfect time to pretend I was a cute blond girl looking for love after getting dumped on national TV. Trust me it isn’t an easy feat. So rather than predict what she’s going to pick, I’ve ranked the 25 bachelors vying for Ali’s heart, according to my personal tastes. Since I haven’t heard any of them speak, I’m basing this solely on their looks and their occupations. Purely superficial, but oh well… it’s the Bachelorette.

THE 15 I WOULD DUMP RIGHT AWAY

I’m not going to be mean, so I’ll just leave this section by saying… “Thanks, but no thanks”.

(from left to right)

Frank, 31, A retail manager, from Geneva, IL
Kasey, 27, An advertising account executive from Clovis, CA
Jay, 29, A lawyer from Barrington, RI
John C., 32, Hotel business development, from Issaquah, WA
Hunter, 28, A internet account executive from San Antonio, TX

(from left to right)

Kyle, 26, An outdoorsman from Highlands Ranch, CO
Craig R., 27, A lawyer from Philadelphia, PA
Craig M., 34, Dental sales, from Sarnia, Canada
Chris N., 29, An entrepreneur from Orlando, FL
Derek, 28, A sales manager from Warren, MI

(from left to right)

Jason, 27, construction consultant from Denver, CO
John N., 27, Engineering software sales, from Wichita, KS
Ty, 31, Medical sales, from Nashville, TN
Steven, 28, A sales representative from Cleveland, OH
Kirk, 27, A sales consultant from Green Bay, WI

THE 9 I WOULD KEEP AND PLAY AROUND WITH

Now, we’re getting to the point of this show. HOT MEN. Watching them taking off their shirts and showing off their male bravado to win over the bachelorette’s heart, makes watching this show tolerable. I watch the Bachelor to watch the women breakdown and the Bachelorette for the six-packs. Here’s my top 9.

(from left to right)

Jonathan, 20, A weatherman from Houston, TX
Tyler M, 25, A catering manager from Austin, TX
Chris H., 27, A real estate developer from Vancouver, Canada

  • Jonathan: A little young, but I’m sure there are a few “lessons” i can give him. Tyler M: He looks like he’d be fun in bed… GRRRRR. Chris M: How can anyone say no to that face. Plus he’s a real estate developer from Vancouver. BONUS.

(from left to right)

Tyler V., 25, Online advertising, from Chelsea, VT
Derrick, 27, A construction engineer from San Diego, CA
Chris L., A landscaper from Cape Cod, MA

  • Tyler V: Love the exotic look and those lips look de.lic.ious. Derrick: It’s obvious he gets his beefy arms from his construction line of work. I’d drill his bits any day of the week. Chris L: I admit, I have a soft spot for dumb looking straight guys. SCORE.

(from left to right)

Justin, 26, An entertainment wrestler from Toronto, Canada
Jesse, 24, A general contractor from Peculiar, MO
Phillip, 30, An investment manager from Chicago, IL

  • Justin: He can pin me down anytime. I’m not gonna put up a fight. Jesse: Adorable smile and I love a boy in a ol’ skool baseball shirt. Phillip: An investment banker with a body like that. Sign me up. I have a few things to “deposit” that I’d like “increased”.

THE ONE, I WOULD HOPE WOULD ASK ME TO MARRY HIM

Roberto, 26, An insurance agent from Charleston, SC

  • If I had to chose one from this group of men, Alberto would be the one for me. He’s not too young, not too old, he’s just right. I do love my blonds, but there something to be said about a man with a little somethin’ somethin’. Not only is he absolutely handsome, but he looks like he’s packing underneath his shirt.

There you have my pick. Which suitor would you give a rose to? The Bachelorette: Around The World premieres Monday May 31, at 8PM. Stay tuned and see if Ali Fedotowsky and I have the same taste in men. I highly doubt it, but you never know.

Check out Homorazzi.com’s Jonny interview with one of Ali’s bachelors below: