Previously on Survivor, JT led the Heroes into the jaws of doom. He and his fellowship convinced themselves that an all-girls alliance was in control of the Villains tribe. If they could save Russell from the evil witches then he would flop over to them after the merge. What JT and his hapless crew didn’t get is that Russell is a scoundrel and his accomplice is a pretty girl who is way smarter than any of them. After JT quietly gave Russell his hidden immunity idol, he immediately told Parvati and they laughed their evil laughs. Then she found another one and decided not to tell Russell about it. She laughed some more. Then Courtney got booted setting us up for a five on five merge. Hold on folks… this is going to be EPIC.

We start off at Camp Elin. The Heroes are looking forward to the merge and hoping everything went according to their crazy ass plan. Did Russell survive? Did he blindside Parvati as per the oh-so-cute and earnest note? Did they make the right decision? Pssst… you guys are suckers!

Over at Camp Tiger, the villains get a map and instructions to head on over to meet the Heroes for the merge. The first thing they do is start strategizing. This is why they have the upper hand… even when the numbers are even. Side note. Has anybody else noticed how obscenely LOW Russell’s shorts are? OMG. That’s almost penis. Sorry… back to the show. Russell and company start working on the story they are going to tell in order to explain how Parvati survived. Something about Russell and Parvati both playing idols. Courtney was just collateral damage. Unfortunately for this plan, Sandra is on the outs and is trying to eavesdrop to get some information she can use to help her at the merge. Watch out for that one. She’s crafty.

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When the merge finally happens JT is bummed to see Parvati there, but immediately assumes that Parvati must’ve played an idol. He’s already falling for the Villains’ lie and they haven’t even told it yet! Oh dear. He must hate watching this right now. His confessionals are full of quotes about how confident he is and how it is all going to work out. As the new Yin Yang (barf) tribe starts their feast, Parvati is looking a little down. It’s clear that the Heroes are bummed she’s there. It’s actually getting to her. She’s pretty sure she’s the number one target and now needs to get to work. You go girl.

Under the shelter, Russell checks in with JT and Rupert. He tells them the fake back story about how Courtney got the boot instead of Parvati. JT falls for it completely. He is so sure. He trusts Russell 100 per cent. This guys is so out to lunch. JT knows that Russell is “solid” because he’s “a good ol’ country boy”. Yeah. A country boy that is screwing your sister behind the barn while shoving pitch forks into your back! Dude… WAKE UP.

Right after that conversation, Sandra quietly pulls Rupert aside in an attempt to spill the beans. She confides in Rupert (they played together in Pearl Islands) that Russell is the kingpin and he’s with Parvati. Sandra tells him that Russell is lying. Rupert is pretty stunned, but still not sure he can believe Sandra. Oh boy.

When he finally gets his wits about him, Rupert pulls JT, Candice and Amanda aside. He tries to warn them about Russell. JT is really quick to dismiss him though and tells Rupert to stop panicking. JT even boasts to the camera that Rupert should just let JT do all the strategizing. Wow. The editors are sure setting this poor country bumpkin up for a rude awakening. Rupert begs them not to trust Russell, saying, “he’s on the Villains tribe for a reason”. Ding Ding Ding! Then Rupert does some good strategizing. They need to make Parvati think she’s the target, but keep the decision until the very end so the Villains can’t pass the idol (that they GAVE Russell) around.

Amanda then goes to work on her part. She needs to use her connection to Parvati to get some information. When they finally get some alone time, Amanda tells Parvati that the Heroes want her gone and she has no power to change their minds. Amanda lies and says she is working hard to get rid of Sandra. Parvati kinda falls for it and lets Amanda know that she has a hidden immunity idol. Doh!

Amanda confesses that she likes Parvati, but can’t let her get to the end because she’ll just win again. Uh oh. Trouble for the Queen! The conversation ends with their Micronesia secret handshake. Both girls walk away thinking they got the upper hand.

When we finally get to the immunity challenge, the ten have to climb super tall poles and hold on. Last one on the pole wins. This looks like another one to favour the people with small feet. JT, Parvati, and Candice have all played this one before. Sandra and Colby both drop out early. She was actually struggling. He admitted that he had no chance given his performance in the last foot hold challenge. Russell can’t find his groove. He’s out. Rupert and his bad toe don’t last long either. He’s out. After 20 minutes, Amanda drops out. The rest of them look pretty comfortable. Then JT falls. Candice is the only Hero left. She’s up against Parvati, Jerri and Danielle. Parvati looks like she could stand there all day.

After an hour and a half, Jerri says she can’t handle the dehydration. She steps down. Then Candice decides she wants out. She starts to climb down the pole. Jeff stops her and asks why she would quit. Why is he so keen on interfering this year? Anyways, she says she’s dropping out because the other two look so strong. Parvati and Danielle immediately start talking about who should win. Danielle wants it because Parvati has the hidden idol. Like a good team player Parvati lets Danielle win. That was nice… but will it cost her?

The Heroes are immediately suspicious that Parvati would give up so easily when she knows she’s a target. They decide they have to make her think she’s in danger so she’ll play the idol, but take out Jerri or Sandra instead. They hope Russell sticks to his word and votes out Parvati. If he does, then their five votes win and take out Jerri or Sandra.

Back at camp, Sandra confesses that she has to keep her big mouth shut. She tried to feed Rupert information, but she hasn’t had anyone from the Heroes approach her with any sort of deal. Looks like she’s stuck with Russell and his plan. She doesn’t like him, but it’s better than her going home.

Then, Russell finds Parvati so he can give her HIS hidden immunity idol that JT GAVE him. Wow. This shit is crazy. Parvati now has two hidden immunity idols. What is Russell gonna do when he finds out Parvati was playing him like he plays everyone else! She giggles and swoons and hugs him. He is putty in her hands.

Parvati isn’t out of the woods quite yet. Amanda is back on her trying to ensure Parvati plays her idol. Unfortunately for Amanda and the Heroes, Parvati sees through her lies. They know each other too well. They lied their way through Micronesia together. Parvati is not falling for it. Amanda flat out tells her to play the idol and save herself. At that moment, Parvati knows she’s not getting the votes. She knows Amanda is lying so she plays along. The editors don’t show us what Parvati’s plan is. It’s off to Tribal Council.

After a whole bunch of nonsense about banana etiquette and plantains, the players all pretty much agree that this vote will set the course for the rest of the game. They are still very divided and hyper aware of the threat hidden idols play. Parvati says she feels like a leper because no one will talk to her. Jeff asks her if that makes her feel bad because she’s so used to getting attention everywhere she goes. Parvati laughs, says she does get all the attention, and then says everyone views her as a big threat. The best thing about this Tribal Council is Courtney on the jury translating everything for Coach. He really has no clue what is going on. She does her best to fill him in.

When it’s time to vote, we actually see a lot of the votes. Russell votes for JT and says it was a real dumb move giving him the idol. Parvati also votes for JT and calls it her love letter for trying to get her out. Jerri votes for JT and says she hopes her name doesn’t get written down. Then magically on cue, we see Amanda write Jerri’s name down. Ooooh. Interesting. Rupert votes for Jerri too and says he hopes Parvati plays the idol and exposes Russell as a liar. Candice votes for Jerri and explains that the Heroes are targeting her because she is the least likely one to receive an idol transfer.

When Jeff comes back with the votes, he asks if anyone would like to play a hidden immunity idol. Parvati raises her hand and digs out an idol. The Heroes (and Russell) all grin. She says, “it would be downright depressing to sit around and watch green bananas turn yellow without my debaucherous little villains… so… SANDRA that’s for you”. Sandra’s says, “get out of here… are you for real”. The Heroes’ grins get bigger. Then Parvati says, “and Jeff I would just like to increase our odds… so… Jerri, that one’s for you too!” She almost squealed that last part as the Heroes’ grins faded to terror. Russell looks on trying really hard not to look confused. Jerri is beyond delighted. She actually looks shocked. Russell is beside himself. He is not used to not knowing what’s going on.

Then Jeff reads the votes. Jerri. Jerri. Jerri. Jerri. Jerri. None of them count. Parvati and Danielle can barely contain their excitement. Then JT gets his votes. He’s a goner. Knocked out by his own idol. Russell turns to Parvati and says, “you have some explaining to do”.

Can’t wait for that conversation. Well done Parvati… one of the best Survivor moments ever.