What do you say I’m talking about? I’m talking about impossible situations in love. It is human nature to want things we can’t have and unfortunately that carries over to our love lives. I have been single for the past 2 years because I decided I no longer want to settle. I want to find “the one” I want to be with and not settle for someone that will do “for now”. If I hadn’t learned anything from my past relationships I would think they were a waste of time but each relationship helped me learn a little bit more about myself and what kind of a boyfriend I was and can be.
My last relationship ended amicably but my love life in turn became tumultuous. It all started with a friend that was in a rocky relationship whose boyfriend was having an affair. Long story short….we ended up having an affair at the same time his bf was having an affair. Yes it didn’t justify either affairs but we’re only human. So you can imagine how things ended since I am still single.
The next ordeal comes in the form of a Spanish man living in Barcelona who I met online and eventually in person on one of my trips to LA. I find myself in Barcelona visiting him for 2 weeks. Although I knew this wasn’t going to be a good idea since I knew I would fall for him even more….I went anyway. My rational at that time was that life is too short. Either way it was going to hurt so I might as well have give it a go. The trip was amazing and we got along famously but alas…reality bites and it bites hard.
The third was the classic case of falling for your best friend. We all know how that ends specially when the feelings are not reciprocated so let’s just leave it at that. This is my downfall…I give too much and dive in too soon. I am a romantic. I fall in love too fast.
The last and most recent one, yet again, I find myself in a similar situation with Barcelona, except this time it’s with Germany. Last month I met Germany on a trip to Orlando and we hit it off and have been talking since. “Germany” used to live in New York up until the last year where he has been living in Los Angeles. So no matter where he ends up if I dive into this…it will be an long distance relationship which I don’t think I really want because I know how challenging those can be but, finding someone you connect with on so many levels is rare. What do I do now? I know how things can potentially end yet I find myself in the same situation again.
What would you do? Have you been in a similar situation? Is there something wrong with me? Do I subconsciouly put myself in these situations because in reality I have commitment issues? Maybe Vancouver is an undateable city? I remember telling my last boyfriend that if I wasn’t dating him, I wouldn’t be dating anyone in this city. We all know fire burns but many us never learn and still touch it.