Let’s start off with the positive. Alicia Keys looked BEAUTIFUL. Considering this week was all about inspirational songs, I felt anything but inspired (minus a couple of exceptions). Keys gave the best tutelage she could provide. She maybe talented, but she ain’t no miracle worker.

While Crystal and Lee continued to prove no one could touch them, Siobhan continued her descent to suckiness. What happened Sio-Sio? In previous years, contestants were spared elimination during “Idol Gives Back” week. Thankfully this year, we are guaranteed to lose some of the talent fat. Can’t we just have another double-elimination to speed up this awful season. BOWERSOX wins… “that’s all” (in Miranda Presley bitchy tone).

7. Tim Urban

Performance: Better Days by Goo Goo Dolls
After a couple of weeks evading the bottom of my list, Tim Urban takes his rightful place as low man on the totem pole. During rehearsal with Alicia, Tim sounded pretty good. But alas, he was all kinds of pitchy during the live show. As this point, it’s more interesting to see how far Tim will go instead of hearing him sing each week.

6. Siobhan Magnus

Performance: When You Believe by Mariah Carey & Whitney Houston
Technically she hit more bum notes than Tim did, but she also hit more difficult ones as well. The judges always warn female contestants to avoid Whitney and Mariah songs. So what was Siobhan thinking when she picked a duet featuring the two divas? She clearly was high… The only thing I liked about this performance was her homage to Mimi, by placing butterflies all over her arm. We all know Carey’s fascination with the beautiful insects.

5. Casey James

Performance: Don’t Stop by Fleetwood Mac
When did Casey become a blond Oompa-Loompa? Is he moonlighting as a contestant on “Dancing With The Stars”? Honestly I can’t even remember what he sang. I was so distracted by his sun-kissed-molested skin. I just remember it not being so bad and being a Fleetwood Mac song I liked.

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4. Aaron Kelly

Performance: I Believe I Can Fly by R. Kelly
A. Kelly took on R. Kelly and while he didn’t quite “soar”, he definitely took flight. Aaron sounded better than he has in weeks and will most likely be safe. With tonight’s performance, I heard for the first time, the quality of his voice. In a few years I think he’ll sound amazing. I just wished he held out trying out for the show a couple of years to nurture his vocals. Warning to all you future teenage wannabe Idols: Unless you’re Jordin Sparks, graduate first before trying out for Idol.

3. Michael Lynche

Performance: Hero by Chad Kroeger
When he first said he was singing “Hero”, I started to convulse a little thinking another Mariah track was going to get slaughtered tonight. Thankfully he chose a Kroeger tune instead. Ever since he was almost eliminated, Michael has reigned in his outlandish antics and attempted to stay humble. He wasn’t as good as last week, but he was definitely in the top tier of performers tonight.

2. Lee DeWyze

Performance: The Boxer by Simon & Garfunkel
At this point, a Lee and Crystal final two seems all but guaranteed. Quel surpris, DeWyze once again stood in the middle of the stage strumming his guitar. Why does he never get called out for being a one trick pony? For one week, I’d love him to just sing a song a cappella with no instrument in his hands. I think the guitar doubles as his security blanket on stage. Without it, I think he’d choke and freak out.

1. Crystal Bowersox

Performance: People Get Ready by The Impressions
WOW. WOW. WOW. Lee should take a few lessons from her. Not only did she look stunning tonight, but her performance took my breath away. The first few bars of her just singing was phenomenal. I literally got shivers on my arms with every note she sang. Like the judges said, she was on a completely different playing field than the rest of the contestants. If she doesn’t win this year, it’ll be a travesty. I loved the personal touch with her using her mic stand from home and for breaking down and crying at the end of her song. If that doesn’t win her more votes… nothing will.

PREDICTED BOTTOM THREE

Even though I ranked Casey lower than Aaron on my list, I predict the high-school student will join both Siobhan and Tim in the bottom three. I think Casey has a bigger and loyal fanbase than Aaron. This season hasn’t been kind to the fairer gender, and unfortunately I have a sinking gut feeling that Siobhan will be leaving us. While this season’s quirkiest contestant has faltered during the past few weeks, I hope she stays as she has way more talent than the both Aaron and Tim combined.

SHOULD GO: Tim Urban
WILL GO: Siobhan Magnus

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