Coming off such a spectacular episode last week, I was wondering if Glee could keep it up. Even though it was an entertaining episode, it wasn’t a homerun like last week’s masterpiece. It started off amazingly with the “Endless Love” duet and the montage of the Glee Club picking duet partners, but then kinda fell flat after that. I really wish they showcased a few of the duos like Kurt & Finn, Mercedes & Puck, and Tina and “other Asian”. Seriously, I want to hear what Brittany, Mark and “other Asian” sound like.

Even though I wasn’t ga-ga over this episode like last, there were still moments that were praiseworthy. Kurt’s obsession with Finn was a definite highlight for me. During the Glee Club’s performance of “Lean on Me”, Kurt’s actions had me in stitches. It was friggin’ hilarious when Kurt motioned a suggestive phone call for Finn to call him when he needed a shoulder to lean on. Speaking of Finn, his singing to Quinn’s unborn baby’s sonogram was comical genius. It was only made funnier, when his Mom caught him in this embarrassing act.

The last thing I want to make note of was the introduction of Suzie Pepper. I love the fact there’s another girl at Mckinley High crazier than Rachel Berry. Producers, take note and add this girl on recurring status. Adding “Pepper” always spices things up, doesn’t it?

LESSON OF THE WEEK

Did Quinn’s mother look familiar, but you just couldn’t place her? It happened to me and it drove me crazy til I looked her up. For all you DOOL (Days of our Lives) fans, Charlotte Ross played Eve Donovan and was also featured on a few seasons of NYPD Blue. The years have not been kind to her. She used to be this hot little thing and now she looks older than my mama.

The other lesson this week is about cooking. PS. I don’t cook so I should be the last person giving advice on this topic. During dinner at the Fabray’s, Finn complemented Judy Fabray on her tasty ham. Judy credited her home curing skills as to why her ham was so juicy and succulent. What is curing?

Curing refers to various food preservation and flavoring processes, especially of meat or fish, by the addition of a combination of salt, sugar, nitrates or nitrite. Many curing processes also involve smoking.

MUSICAL NUMBERS

If you’ve been the reading the site for a few months now, you probably know I’m all about the adult-contemporary ballads. And even more so if they’re duets. So it should come as no surprise, that the “Endless Love” duet with Will & Rachel was my favorite. Not only were the vocals spot on for this number, the random dialogue in between lyrics had me cracking up.

“I’ll Stand By You” has got to be one of my favorite songs ever, but Finn’s version (though hilarious considering who he was singing it to) felt a little empty. Carrie Underwood and Gina Glocksen’s (Idol Season 6) renditions were far better. Yes, I know both Carrie and Gina are singers, but still. Moving on, I was bummed that Rachel’s “Crush” moment was cut short by Will ejecting the disc out. Thankfully a full length version of the cover can be purchased from iTunes.

ENDLESS LOVE
Original Artist: Diana Ross & Lionel Ritchie
Glee Performance By: Rachel & Will

DON’T STAND SO CLOSE TO ME / YOUNG GIRL MASHUP
Original Artist: The Police / Gary Puckett
Glee Performance By: Will

LEAN ON ME
Original Artist: Bill Withers / Club Nouveau
Glee Performance By: Glee Club

I’LL STAND BY YOU
Original Artist: The Pretenders
Glee Performance By: Finn

CRUSH
Original Artist: Jennifer Paige
Glee Performance By: Rachel

YOU’RE HAVING MY BABY
Original Artist: Paul Anka
Glee Performance By: Finn

Here are the best sound bites from last night’s episode. Enjoy.

Will: Who knows what this word (ballad) means?
Brittany: It’s a male duck!

Rachel: Looks like my weekly letter to the Ohio Show Choir Committee finally paid off.
Puck: (gives condescending nod)

Will: Whoever you choose is your partner?
Brittany: I bet the duck is in the hat.

Tina: Other Asian (name of her ballad partner she picked)

Kurt: I can totally sing this song with Finn. But screw him if he thinks he’s taking the Diana Ross part from me.

Puck: I love the days when I don’t wear underwear. Full commando.

Finn: I never noticed how nice Rachel’s butt is. Oh crap, I think Quinn knows I’m staring at it.
Quinn: (looks at Finn sternly)

Rachel: Wow, I’ve never noticed this before because he’s always tried to destroy my career but Mr. Schu has really pretty eyes. And really nice teeth. He’s obviously invested in good oral hygiene and that’s important to me. It shows wonderful self-esteem.

Will: I don’t like the way she’s looking at me. Ah, I shouldn’t have sung this song to her. Crap, she looks crazy right now.

Quinn: God, I miss the firm support of my polyester Cheerio’s uniform. The control panel hid my baby bump perfectly.

Quinn’s mother: Now you spend all your free time sitting on a stool in the dark singing show tunes. You know how many calories you burn singing? Not very many.

Rachel: Gold stars are kind of my signature thing. I figured every time you wear it you can think of me and the star you’re helping me become.

Pepper: Mr Schu, how do you conjugate the verb, “to love”?

Pepper: Peppers, so you can wear them and think of me, Suzie Pepper.

Terri: Who is it? Who died? (waking up to Susie stalking Will)

Pepper: You knew it was me just by the sound of my breath. That’s so romantic.

Terri: Listen you little pyscho, this is Will’s wife. And if I don’t get enough sleep, my anti-depressants won’t work and then I’ll go crazy and I’ll kill you. STOP CALLING.

Kurt: Your lashing out at me is fantastically compelling and inappropriate.

Kurt: Girls, they’re your problem. They’re up, they’re down. Girls.

Kurt: You do well with classics, especially in the soft-rock mode.

Finn’s mother: We’re you just singing to a sonogram?

Quinn: You’re wrong. I’m right. I’m smart. You’re dumb.

Tina: All this baby drama is making my rosacea act up.

Kurt: How do you explain the constant irritation with you. It’s because she’s a Girrrrrl.
Finn: I think it’s the pregnancy hormones or something, they make her kinda nuts.
Kurt: It’s enough to give up women all together. (giggle)

Kurt: He was my knight-in-shining armor. My feelings lingered stronger as we bonded over Glee, then football, then skincare.

Kurt: I don’t know why I find his stupidity charming. I mean, he’s cheating of a girl who thinks the square root of four is rainbows.

Kurt: She’s going to end up disappointing him and breaking his heart and then he’ll be crying into my shoulder pads.

Emma: I, too, am very curious about the power of the ballad. I’m thinking of doing some career counseling in song.

Will: Do you think you understood the message I was trying to get across with that ballad.
Rachel: Yes, it means I’m very young and it’s hard for you to stand close to me.

Kurt: He had a weapon.
Finn: You think I should bring a gun?
Kurt: No, I think you should use your greatest weapon- your voice.

Rachel: Casserole is almost ready. Hope you like venison.

Terri: I’ve been dealing with these schoolgirl crushes for years. So why shouldn’t I get a little something out of it.

Terri: I have a rash on my belly from the cocoa butter that your mother sent me. Do you have any idea how much it burns when I sweat. I can’t scrub the floors as hard as she can.

Terri: So, I’m going to show you the bleeding pustials on my skin. Wow, yeah no, that’s going to send you in the loving arms of a teenage slut.

Will: I’m taking Rachel home.
Terri: Can you ask her to dusk the blinds in the craft room first?

Finn: Mmm, what a lovely ham.
Quinn’s Mom: Thank you
Quinn’s Dad: There’s not beating Judy’s ham.
Quinn’s Mom: I cure my own meats.

Quinn’s Dad: My first married a wonder Christian man who owns his chain of UPS stores.

Kurt: Just remember the power of the ballad.
Finn: I have to go or they’ll think I’m pooping.

Pepper: Hey Barbra Streisand, we need to have a little talk.

Pepper: Let me tell you a few things I learned from two years of intense psycho-therapy and an esophagus transplant. Lesson no.1, you and Schu it won’t work.
Rachel: What do you mean?
Pepper: We’re not so different, you and me. We’re both mildly attractive and extremely grating.

Pepper: Trust me. I’m a cautionary tale. You need to find some self-respect, Rachel. Get that mildly attractive groove back.

Kurt: So they just kicked her out.
Finn: Yeah, they gave her a half an hour to pack. Father set the timer on the microwave.

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