Six Worst Excuses From Anti-Gay Public Figures When Caught In Gay Scandals

I love a good ol’ fashioned gay scandal. But nothing makes me more excited to learn more about it when it involves someone who is a public figure and has opposed gay rights and issues. Thanks to NY Mag’s Daily Intel, we can take a look at some of the nation’s best gay scandals and the excuses for why they happened or… didn’t happen.

These are six of the best gay scandals that we’ve seen featuring state representatives, megachurch superstars, senators and lawmakers. When you’re in hot water, you’ll say anything to get out of it, and these men did just that. However, their excuses weren’t that viable, especially to us gays who really know how things like Grindr and RentBoy.com work. Check out some of the best (or worst) excuses for a gay scandal below.

6. METH & A MASSAGE

Megachurch preacher Ted Haggard initially claimed that his relationship with male prostitute Mike Jones was totally innocent — Jones had merely sold him meth and given him a massage.

5. INNOCENT CHITCHAT

Indiana state lawmaker Phil Hinkle claims that he doesn’t know why he met an 18-year-old man in a hotel room recently after arranging the rendezvous on Craigslist, but that the two merely talked of “baseball and the view.”

4. WIDE STANCE

Former Idaho senator Larry Craig famously blamed a wide stance for inadvertently signaling to his next-door stall neighbor (who turned out to be a police officer) that he wanted to engage in some bathroom sex. (In reality, Craig’s exact phrase was that he is a “wide guy,” which may actually be an even worse excuse than having a wide stance.)

3. DOCUMENTING WEIGHT LOSS

After nude photos of Puerto Rican senator Roberto Arango showed up on the gay networking app Grindr, Arango explained, “You know I’ve been losing weight. As I shed that weight, I’ve been taking pictures.” Arango must have lost a lot of weight in his anus, because it’s featured in one of the photos.

2. BLACK PEOPLE

Florida state representative Bob Allen claimed that the only reason he agreed to blow an undercover cop and pay him $20 is because the cop was a “pretty stocky black guy, and there was nothing but other black guys around in the park” and Allen was afraid he “was about to be a statistic.” Apparently, being a horrible racist is way better than being gay.

1. LUGGAGE HELP

George Rekers, the vehemently anti-gay activist and co-founder of Family Research Council, insisted that he brought a male escort on his trip to Spain because he’d “had surgery” and couldn’t “lift luggage.” So he’d done what everyone looking for luggage help does — he went on rentboy.com and hired someone with a “perfectly built 8 inch cock.”

Which gay scandal excuse is your favorite?

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  • ahmad

    hhhhh
    i so hate these assholes

  • this is the best article i ever read, i wish more hypocrite will be outed later

  • HMKI

    this is hilarious!!!!