Celebrity Apprentice 3 Episode 4: “You Guys Would Be Like Watching Ice Melt”

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Oh how I love spending two hours with Sharon Osbourne & Cyndi Lauper every week, and yes, even on Easter. I’m being sarcastic – but those two do make this show though. So, after last week’s episode, the teams are brought back in the boardroom right away and have to pick a project manager on the spot. Michael Johnson immediately says caveman-governor Rod (who can’t type or text) for the men, while Victoria’s Secret model, Selita Ebanks volunteers herself.

Well, things are a bit different in this episode as Trump tries to shake things up a bit (contrary to his famously retarded hair-do). For the first time in Apprentice history, the Project Manager will not be physically working with their teams. In fact, Rod & Selita have to immediately leave right away on a plane to an undisclosed location. Their limo picks them up and away they go. They arrive in Orlando, Florida. The task is to create & present a three dimensional interactive display to Harry Potter Fans, as they promote the newest attraction at Universal Orlando.

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As they commence, there’s a bit of drama going on with the women – big surprise. Holly & Cyndi totally clash and don’t seem to get along. Sharon, as per usual, sticks up for Cyndi, feeling that Holly isn’t giving her the respect she deserves. I thought Girls Just Wanna Have Fun? Sharon says, “You guys would be like watching ice melt,” telling the girls that they’d be nothing without Cyndi. I love Sharon – she always calls it like it is. It’s funny though, Maria Kanellis from WWE is the only one not partaking in the fighting. How ironic.

Via phone (after he figures out how to work it), Rod assigns Brett to be in charge of everything creative. Brett steps up to the plate and runs with it.

Selita gets her team in order via phone from Orlando as well (and while wearing her shades INSIDE at her computer).

The projects managers reunite with their teams and see what they’ve accomplished. Rod feels that Brett could have used more help from the other guys, while the entire team feels that Rod didn’t give enough direction. Hmm, perhaps Rod could have done without that nap on the plane, while Selita was working the runway?

Both teams get into costume & character, trying to use their magic to woo the Universal execs & Harry Potter fans during each of their presentations.

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Cyndi Lauper is soooo in character….”Don’t look at me, look at the screen,” she repeats over and over to the child, in character as…. a crazy person?! “For Fuck sakes Cyndi, shut up,” Sharon thinks to herself. Overall, their presentation and display was pretty freaking awesome. Excellent in character, very interactive, professional, some special affects, and true to the story.

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The men were a lot of fun too. Brett isn’t the best at being in character, but Curtis steps up in his role as The Teacher. Brett worries their all gonna go to prison with how awkward it’s getting. “Would you like to use my wand?” says Curtis to the child. I would like to use your want Curtis. Definitely. Anyway, when questioned by one of the Execs about the roller-coaster at the attraction, the men knew next to nothing. Fail.

In the boardroom, the women win again. Third time in a row. As Trump interrogates the men now, Rod won’t say who he thinks did a bad job. Trumps suspects it’s because in real life he has his trial coming up and their might be Black or Jewish jurors on it that he doesn’t want to piss off. Seriously Trump? Too far. I’d be livid if I was Rod from bringing shit like that up, but that’s his own fault for thinking that going on this show is going to keep his ass out of prison. Just like how his wife thought it was a good idea to go on I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here, along side Speidi. Seriously, who’s recommending they make these stupid decisions? Did you know that Governor Rod had one of the worse approval ratings in history? Ouch.

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Anyway, Rod brings Curtis & Michael back to the boardroom, after he gets challenged on why he didn’t bring Brett who was in charge of everything back. Not giving enough direction to his team, Rod is fired. What reality show will he and his wife do next?

  • Sean

    Best part of the review…the thought you put in my head about Curtis Stone’s wand….yummy. I can’t imagine anything more magical!