Canada’s Next Top Model Cycle 3 Episode 7: “I’m Losing My Shit If You Can’t Tell”

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Previously on Canada’s Next Top Model… Maryam was stranded once again without a passport, Linsay made a serious comeback, and Heather got the boot even though she had the best overall portfolio. Only 4 “models” remain. Who will get the bent over the suitcase runny mascara confessional tonight?

The final four! Yay! The girls are at the SoHo so so excited. Scratch that. Nikita’s gonna rain on the parade. She’s sad that Heather is gone. She’s like Bella Swan. DEPRESSING. Just die already Bella… you talk about it in EVERY single damn prologue! Sorry. I’m at the cabin. It’s been storming the last few days and I’ve been reading the Twilight saga back to back. I’m already well into Eclipse. Hundreds of pages later and I kinda want Bella and Edward to go the fuck away so I can read more about Alice and Jacob. What was I saying about Nikita? She’s a bag. That’s what.

Before Nikita can throw herself off the cliffs of La Push or crash her motorcycle or run into the arms of a hostile monster, Jay makes a surprise visit with MISS J! She is wearing nothing but her traditional runway diva coach extraordinaire attire… an oversized men’s shirt. That’s it. Gotta love those legs. The girls all screamed and Meaghan told the camera she was SO EXCITED to meet “him… her?” Small lol. That joke never gets old.

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Miss J gives the girls some panties and bras to put on so s/he can properly assess their walks in the apartment. S/he does his/her best to make fun of them and give them constructive feedback. As always, there is lots of obligatory face making and arm flapping. There was a lot of “hot runway mess” as Miss J so deliciously put it. Linsay seemed to impress the most. Maryam faltered.

The girls are then whisked away with their new bff runway coach for the challenge. They have to work some on the spot dresses made out of toilet paper. I was about to call bullshit on this challenge when Miss J told the girls it was a fake out. Phew. The real challenge was to strut in real couture dresses made out of real tissue. They brought in some really nice dresses and the actual designers to judge the girls on the runway. Backstage, Maryam ignored the warnings not to touch the dresses and then ripped Linsay’s dress. Needless to say, there was MAJOR dramz.

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Despite the dress ripping incident, the girls all did ok on the runway. Linsay and Nikita were better than the other two. Maryam once again was the letdown. Miss J then announced that Linsay was the winner! Go girl! She got to go shoe shopping with the “frock and roll” hall of famer him/herself.

Back at the SoHo, Meaghan and Nikita went all Mean Girls on poor Maryam. They trashed her behind her back for a while in confessional. Ugh. I’m getting too old for this shit. Move on ladies.

For the photo shoot this week, the girls finally got put to the real test. The easy breezy beautiful test. CoverGirl! Hottie McMakeMeSteamy Mike Ruiz was the photographer. This is when the competition gets serious. You can’t fuck this one up and expect to win. It was a surprising shoot, with surprising results.

Anyways, here is the rundown. To check out the CNTM Cycle 3 photo gallery, click here.

Linsay
During the photo shoot, she actually looked like a CoverGirl. The way she moved and smiled… it was perfect. Mike and Nole seemed quite impressed. The actual shot is great. I love her eyes. The judges agreed. Very pretty. Very soft.

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Maryam
During the shoot, Nole and Mike were quite surprised. Maryam toned down her inner fierceness and gave them soft. But the actual photo ended up looking fake to me. Emotionless almost. I like the whole Egyptian goddess thing, but something is missing. The judges were on the fence.

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Meaghan
Oh Dear. She struggled during the shoot. Nole was all over the map. He didn’t like her hair, he stopped the shoot, he fussed over the makeup and she broke down. There were tears and sneers all over the place. It came across in the photo too. She looks awkward. The judges let her off the hook though. Hmmmm.

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Nikita
Bella Swan was depressed before the shoot began. She was worried that a fierce editorialnista like her would bomb the soft CoverGirl thing. But, they gave her some bang extensions and she found the pretty. At panel she shat all over herself, called her photo “retarded” and generally came across as an idiot… much like Bella. The judges really liked it though. Argh.

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So who goes home? Miss J was at panel to help out this week. They made the girls do one more runway show before getting down to business. Linsay was called first. Yay! Nikita was second. Boo! Maryam and Meaghan found themselves in the bottom two with Maryam sent packing. It was kind of obvious. Maryam was the target all night. Oh well, by the end of it I was over her too.

Still on Team Linsay! My girl’s got momentum!

  • Andre Theriault

    I don’t know but there’s a rumour that Nikita is going to win the competition…Does that make sense?

    I don’t like Linsay’s jaw in the covergirl picture for some reason…drag ish….maybe?? :S Looks nice though.

  • Nika

    OMG yes I can’t belive Meaghan stayed in I am soooo glad I love her!!! And I looove the glasses!!!!

  • summer

    this article made me laugh out loud on a rainy wednesday morning… yay for homorazzi 😀

  • Robyn

    Buh bye Maryam… it’s about time. Now you’ve got all the time in the world to work on getting your passport instead of having your pictures taken in sketchy “friends who own reptiles” apartments.

    Great recap Rich…
    Enjoy your holday!

  • David

    just found your website – and I’m already LOVING it!

    I for one would love Nikita to win…but the final three actually rocks this time so I’m cool with anyone taking the title of CNTM 🙂

  • Enjoy the site David… but Nikita! Gasp. 😉

    I liked her ast first, but her edit has done meshed with my viewing tastes at all. I totally agreed with Mike Ruiz that her self hate thing was gettng boring. If I am gonna celebrate a Nikita win, she has got some redeeming to do.

  • Dan

    Another amazing write-up buddy!

    My favourite part of the night was when Nikita tried to correct herself after saying the word ‘retarded’ on television. I now really want to see her come in second place, for the ultimate slap in the face!

  • Meaghan’s got this in the bag.

  • Calix

    Why am I the only one who was rooting for Maryam… Is it only me who noticed that this episode was all about ganging up on Maryam?!?!… who by the way is gorgeous and has delivered week after week… I agree the fact that she did not have her passport wasproblematic… but she proved to be creative & resourceful thus exhibiting her drive and desire to become an accomplished model.
    Nikita, I have serious issues with her, her attitude, lack of maturity & professionalism… I think they should have sent her packing a couple of episodes ago…although she can produce great editorial prints, she lacks versatility…

  • maria

    I am fan of Maryam. I think the behavior of all 3 girls was not fair at all. Maryam is so kind and she has enough talent too.
    and getting passport is not beyond her control this is something related to her country embassy. and I think Lindsy or Meaghan’s should get it.

  • eli

    It’s so ridiculous that Maryam is gone,I can’t believe it,maryam was the best ,she has the face,the body,and everything a top model needs…
    Maryam and Meaghan have beautiful faces but Nikita and Linsay,they really don’t have.
    i think it was all for her passport:-oI’m reallly shoked!!!
    Maryam wasn’t ordinary,she was different.I believe she was perfect… .
    I can’t understand one thing,before this episode marym was “the most professional 18 year old in the history of the world” and everything was ok with maryam,and now I don’t know what happened!!!!!!!!!!…

  • Asia

    I have always felt Canada’s Next Top Model was lame compared to America’s Next Top Model, but the thing I have noticed is that the girls on the Canada version are so very “MEAN GIRLS”, where the US girls just seem to have fights one on one.

    I was hoping that Canada’s Next Top Model would finally choose a girl of a different ethnic background – but as Maryam got axed I saw that hope die.

    What disgusts me the most is one of those nasty mean girls is going to win – I hope one day the “winner” ends up in Paris and has a group of real models telling her what an idiot she is in French so she can have a taste of her own medicine.

    Even with English as her second language, Maryam was clearly smarter than the 3 mean girls combined, and no doubt has a bright future ahead of her… these 3 bishes, ha! Maybe they will end up working at Dollarama like the season 1 winner!

    Meanwhile I will boycott Cashmere, CoverGirl (who wears that crap anyway?) and Perfect10 (more P&G crap).

  • Tiffany

    Oh boo hoo Maryam is gone. All the girls meaned on her…Actually NO, not all of the girls. Linsay didn’t stoop to name calling or mocking even though she had good reason for being pissed at Maryam for ripping her dress.
    Maryam isn’t as sweet as her tears and hugs suggest. Shes a big liar who didn’t own up to ripping the dress, and to top it off she tried to blame it on Linsay. Maryam fans would have had a fit if it was Nikita Linsay or Heather that ripped a dress and blamed it on someone else. But when Maryam rips a dress and tries to point the finger at another girl it’s ok ??
    Nikita and Heather should not have made fun of Maryam’s struggle with English, but that doesn’t make Maryam an angel. She so obviously tried to get Linsay in a lot of trouble with the judges and designers by blaming Linsay for the wrecking the dress. Lucky the other girl’s witnessed what happened and let the judges know that it wasn’t Linsay’s fault.

  • Asia

    Maybe you watched a different episode than I did… Linsay definitely tripped and ripped the dress some more… she can say it was all because of the rip caused by Maryam, but what she can’t dispute is that the three mean girls circled around Maryam like vultures, bullying her. Linsay thinks she is a role model for girls with that behaviour? At least Nikita admits she is a bitch! And Meghan is a wannabe.

  • Keri

    Yeah, Maryam didn’t deny doing it. She noted that Linsay tripped which the other girls conveniently neglected, which hardly counts as truthful behaviour.

    Maryam was my favourite in the house, but in all reality, she wasn’t the full-package model that they likely want out of the winner. She takes stunning pictures – better than any of the remaining three, but is not yet a strong public speaker, and needs to improve on her runway.

    Amazing potential, though, and great drive. If she chooses to pursue modelling, I’m sure she’ll do well for herself.

  • Tiffany

    Linsay stumbled….but Maryam ripped the damn dress!!! then says oh the rip was small, Now that counts as dishonest behaviour!! so I don’t believe anything Maryam says.