Previously on America’s Next Top Model, there was a lot of blubbering as the wannabes had to pose on the edge of a building and a couple of them almost crapped their pants. There was also some heavy panting as Laura lusted after a Hong Kong action star amidst accusations from the others of sluttery. And if that wasn’t enough drama, Alisha tried to fall on her top model sword for Eboni of all people and offered to go home instead of the pigtailed wonder. Tyrant was not amused. She sent them both packing. Crazy! Almost as crazy as Kelly Cutrone’s ongoing hate-on for Annaliese. How many times will Laura say sex? Will Annaliese be able to convince Kelly that she’s a model? Can Sophie rebound from her fear-filled photoshoot? Only three wannabes remain. Who will be eliminated tonight?

Here we go folks… the penultimate episode that will decide the final two of one of the most lackluster Cycles on record. Ratings are down, our patience with Tyrant is running razor thin, the photoshoots were average with only a couple standouts, the drama was artificial, and there were a lack of girls to really root for. But hey… that could all change if Sophie wins! Team Sophie. And in the immortal words of Robyn from Cycle 1…. “Oooooooh Jesus”!

We start off this week back at the MGM Grand and things are pretty muted. Everyone feels traumatized from what went down at panel with Eboni and Alisha. Sophie says she proud of her for holding true to herself but wishes she could have held it together just a little bit longer. Moving on, Sophie is pretty stoked to be in the final three, Annaliese thinks she’s the underdog, and Laura is proud to be the last American. She loves how you can achieve the “American Dream” when you put your mind to it. And there it is. It’s official. The American Dream is to win a modelling reality show. Congrats America.

Later that night, the wannabes get some Tyra Mail… pretty obvious that there is a round of Go-Sees coming up. Laura is freaking out. She’s sick of Go-Sees. They did the Dorchester, they did Toronto, why do they have to do Hong Kong and Macau! Ummm…. Hallurrrrr. You want to be a MODEL. You better get used to Go-Sees there sweet cheeks. Good lord. I want to be a model but I don’t want to model I just want to model.

The next day the three wannabes meet Kelly Cutrone on the Star Ferry in Hong Kong’s harbour. Annaliese is not pleased to see her because she knows the biatch don’t like her. Kelly then goes on to describe the challenge. Also, Miss Fashion PR Maven is wearing a hideous grey tent over a heinously ill-fitted black blouse. Her hair might be greasy too. Just sayin’! Anyways, each girl is going to have to hit up four different designers. They will get some actual cash money for every designer they book. They each get a local male model to help show them around. Cue some lusting from Laura.

First up is Sophie at William Tang. He liked her figure but kept his poker face on. Laura was second to see William. He wasn’t very impressed with her walk. Apparently she’s not “stable”. He was much more complimentary towards Annaliese. He really liked her complexion. She’s stoked to be the only black girls left against the blondes. It helps her stand out. Next up was Sophie at the House of Siren with Gregory Derham. He thought she was sophisticated and fantastic. Annaliese then popped up at SPY with Henry Lau. She wasn’t wowing him. Back to Laura. She’s at Nude is Rude with designer Marisa Zeman. She was knocked for her walk again. Uh oh. And know we’re back to the House of Siren, which seems to be a bizarre costume meets fashion warehouse, with Annaliese. The designer thought she looked gorgeous in a black bikini that had glittery bananas hanging off it. True story. He also thought Laura looked great in red disco ball but thought her walk (AGAIN!) was the weakest. Back at Spy, Sophie and Laura impressed. At Nude is Rude, Marisa Zemen loved Sophie in her clothes. Annaliese was Zemen’s favourite though. Interesting. All of Annaliese’s positive feedback should drive Kelly crazy!

Now for the results! Laura booked two jobs. Annaliese got three. And, Sophie booked ALL FOUR! She is the winner. Wow. Have we seen a ANTM contestant book all Go-Sees in one challenge before? Crazy. She’s ecstatic. Go Sophie! And… Marisa Zemen decided to make Sophie the face of Nude is Rude! Wow. That’s a real gig!

And then the fun begins! The girls hit the town with the male models! Sophie is spraying champagne, girls are taking shots, Laura is in confessional with pit stains, and all that money they made is gone! Partay!

The next day, the girls get to the photoshoot for the ANTM fragrance Dream Come True. Mr. J is there with photographer Jez Smith. Woof. I just fell in love a little bit. OMFG. Did I mention… WOOF. He is hot. It’s a high fashion shoot as the girls claim into a life size perfume bottle.

Sophie

She looked gorgeous in the styling and was having a lot of fun. J said it was magical and pretty and that she was really feeling the creative, nut the client guy (I missed his name) was pretty cagey. Her final pic is definitely the best of the bunch. Not her best work, but Jez says it’s fresh, and Nigel thinks it’s stunning.

Annaliese

She seemed to disappoint the photographer, J, and the client when she first started posing. There was no excitement. She was definitely struggling, but managed to turn it around a bit in the last few minutes. Interestingly at panel, Kelly started off by congratulating her on the 3 Go-See bookings and saying she was proud of her. Huh. How does that crow taste Kelly? As for the pic… it’s nice, but I can’t get past the fact that she looks like she’s masturbating. Nigel thinks she looks like a tennis player. Jez says she froze up in the moment but definitely has presence.

Laura

She started off a little worried because the styling is very Barbie doll and frilly. She’s not frilly. She was not loving the whole set up. J was worried that she was being too sexy. The final pic is actually pretty good though and not too sexy. The pose and lighting are great, but the close up is a little off with her face. It’s doing something weird. Jez thinks the photo is gorgeous but notes that she missed the mark with the client… not youthful enough. Kelly thinks it looks like an ad for a plastic surgeon’s office. Ouch.

At panel, the gorgeously woofy Jez Smith is there to help make the big call. He and Nigel need to throw down. Seriously. So who is heading to the final two and a runway show with… gasp… FOREVER 21? The first finalist is SOPHIE. Awesome. The second finalist is… dramatic pause… Laura. Obviously. Her stronger photo portfolio was enough to overcome booking the fewest Go-Sees, getting fired from a Toronto fashion show, and being a one-trick pony… Tyrant’s words… not mine. See ya Annaliese!

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ANTM Cycle 18 Photo Gallery

To check out all high-res pics from this episode, head over to our ANTM Cycle 18 gallery.