An Open Letter To Rihanna

Dear Rihanna,

You’ve done this to me, your unconditional fan, and it’s not my fault. You’ve now officially set yourself up to be hated. You’ve done the impossible, and changed my opinion of you in mere seconds so drastically, that my head is still spinning, and not because it was thrown against a car window. Too soon? Well, you’re telling me that apparently it’s not. So open the flood gates, and make it rain. It’s all fair game now.

Loved your whole album, really thought Talk That Talk was amazing. As a matter of fact, I hadn’t been so excited for anything from you since Music of the Sun and your single most holy grail Pon de Replay. That’s saying a lot. So trust me when I tell you that I gave your album a good hard listen two or three thousand times, even defended you when you released Talk That Talk as your single (not your smartest choice, but you’re my homegirl Ri). I especially liked the taste that Track 5 left in my mouth. It was dirty really, and gritty ghetto fun. Had all the makings of a good filthy classic. But at 1:18 long, it was cut too short. Again I publically defended you for your creative choices but secretly wished and dreamed a little dream that one day you would release a full length version of Birthday Cake. And then I found out you had plans to. And then I cheered and peed and danced because I was excited.

And then you released it. Featuring Chris Brown.

Are you doing this to hurt me? Or are you doing this to hurt your fans in general who’ve helped your album sales, defended your stance in your abuse charges, who, for some, in helping to raise you back up, really became truly aware of what it was like to deal with abuse and have it hit close to home? You have that power now, for people to really feel like you’re part of their lives. Your fans love you. And they will follow you wherever you go. And some will follow you in the thought pattern that you’re creating by putting someone who hit you, threw you, punched you, bit you, and strangled you, on your track. It’s not okay. There’s actually nothing about it that’s okay. Not a gleam, not a shimmer, not a piece of curly red hair right about it.

I heard rumours you two were shacking up. I decided to sweep them under the rug. Millions of my closest friends and I boycotted the grammies because of that crazy abusing bastard. I figured I was doing the right thing as your fan. I read fantastic articles and reposted them in not only your honour, but in the honour of anyone who’s been severely abused or beaten, and had society so readily and easily forgive the abuser. After all this, after defending you, boycotting for you, reposting for you, you’ve done nothing short of repaying me and millions of your fans with severely breaking our hearts.

And the sad thing is, impressionable young girls will follow you here. Into a world where women continue to go back to the man that makes them feel badly. Where they continue to seek male approval at any cost, that cost quite often being their lives. They don’t have money, and a recording contract, they don’t have 24/7 security if they need it, or publicists, or the freedom to do whatever they feel like doing because they feel like doing it. The majority of these women that have been or are in your situation are trapped and looking for someone with enough public attention and influence, with more balls than you have proven you have, to take on the social responsibility you fell into, someone beautiful and strong to look up to, that will be able to tell them that it is not okay under any circumstance or any situation for a man to raise his hand to a woman, let alone bite, strangle, bash, and punch one repeatedly like Chris Brown did to you only three short years ago. But apparently three years is enough time to forgive a man for almost killing you, and show your forgiveness by putting him on a track that millions will be listening to, endorsing his lifestyle and mentality, furthering his career, and making him some money.

You’re a disappointment to the world Rihanna. Because now I can see clearly, under that hard, cool, sexy exterior that I’ve loved for so many years, you’re just a spoiled, selfish, ugly little girl too wrapped up in her own world to see how many people she’s hurting, how many hearts she’s breaking, and how much damage she’s doing.

It was your 24th birthday yesterday Rihanna. Happy Birthday. You lost a fan.

Nic

  • Erin

    Has anyone ever thought about it from the perspective of someone who HAS been abused? Well how bout I give you some insight!!! I spent two years with someone who hit me, spit on me, and called me down every chance he had!!!I got smart and left!!! Years went by… I moved on… we met again years later and you know what I had forgiven for the sake of my own sanity I had too!!! We talked even hugged and made peace because That was what I needed to be able to fully let go of the horrible feelings I was holding inside because of what happined!!!! NO I did not go back, but would I be friendly and cordial if I saw this person again? YES! Because through the years I have learned that holding on to grudges of any sort in any way for too long only inables the person who abused you to continue to do so!!!! Someone mentioned earlier that noone has considered the fact that ReRe May not WANT to be the poster child for abuse against women!!! I AGREE!!! SHE didn’t ask for the abuse. When it happined SHE didn’t ask the jerk who sold the pictures of her battered face to share those photos!!! Which must have been terribly embarrassing and I’m sure only contributed to the shame and complete obliteration of whatever self esteem and confidence she may have been holding on to after such a terrible assult! Which would have only added to the self doubt and depression!!! The thing is when someone is an abuser they don’t start by hitting they start by making you feel more worthless than you have ever felt before then they pull you away from anyone that could make you feel worth before escalating to actual physical abuse!!! It’s a VERY difficult thing to overcome!!! I feel that her forgiving and moving on and recording with him is her way of showing HIM -Hey guess what you can fuck me up for a time but you can NEVER REALLY GET ME DOWN!!!! If she does go back then she either has seen a huge chainge!!! WHICH CAN HAPPINE!!!!! My partner was just recently released from jail for break and enter due to a drug addiction and is doing great!! Complete new relization on life due to a recovery from the drugs that were throwing them off course!!! BELIEVE m e PEOPLE CAN CHAINGE!!! and the public persona they show is so distorted from who they really are!!! Lets face it when things with you and your partner are not so good do you tell all your friends EVERY DIRTY DETAIL? NO because it’s a shamefull feeling to admit that things aren’t going well so who the hell are we to judge what we obviously only know the smallest details to? Some people need to forget to move on it isn’t a weakness if it’s in thier best emotion interest!!! Some people do chainge!! Only the two in this situation truely know whats going on and whats best!!! If everyone is sooooo concerned with ReRe’s life and what she had to endure they would stop personifying her as a rolemodle for domestic abuse!!! It is obviously a title that she is uncomfortable with and that she herself never chose!!!! Why punish her more for something she never asked for in the first place jus let her be!!!

  • nikki

    Her actions are bad yes. But when you don’t know any better what else can you do? Her mother was abused but stayed with her father. This stuff is a cycle.

    By calling her childish names and judging her we are being hypocrites, im sure we all have done things in life that have been questionable. Nobody is perfect.

  • JJS12

    Great letter. I feel the exact same way. It’s interesting to see that I (we) were right all along and that Rihanna IS in fact back with Chris. It wan’t just a little song or forgiving. It was her moving backwards into a place she said she was done with.

    That Diana Sawyer interview… remember that? She said she didn’t want to make other girls think it was ok to go back to your abuser? What happened to that?!

    I agree. The only way to make her see is to hit her where it hurts. The wallet. I will not be buying anything she puts out musically or otherwise. I have been told that because I am a “fan” that I am not allowed to have an opinion and must blindly support anything and everything she does. Well that’s BS. To be a TRUE fan for me means having respect for that person, which is something I no longer have for Rihanna and also why I am no longer a fan.

  • alex

    hey lemme clear the fucking air robyn’s personal life has nothing to do with her music and her work please that’s none of the fan’s business and by the way would you bash somebody at a normal job because he/she does the same as her? WELL HECK NO BECAUSE THAT’S NOT RIGHT HER PERSONAL LIFE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU PLEASE GROW UP AND GET A LIFE

  • alex

    by the way who are you to criticize anybody you should take a look at your own mistakes instead of looking at the others’ ones and who the fuck cares about what you’ve got to say! it’s NOBODY’S BUT HERS BUSINESS GET INTO YOUR OWN PROBLEMS AND THINGS NOT HERS BECAUSE SHE DOESNT EVEN KNOW YOU EXIST

  • alex

    I JUST THINK YOU’RE ALL IGNORANT THERE AIN’T NO SENSE OF TALKING TO PEOPLE LIKE YOU, AND YOU KNOW WHAT? I SOMETIMES GET ASHAMED OF THE WORLD I LIVE IN BECAUSE OF PEOPLE LIKE YOU YOU GUYS COMMENTING AND MAKING OPINIONS ABOUT SOMEONE ELSE’S LIFE IT’S DISGUSTING IT SEEMS LIKE YOU’VE GOT NOTHING MORE TO DO.