Phew, thank God the auditions are almost over. Just one more “Best of the Rest” episode tomorrow and it’s Hollywood week. It couldn’t arrive fast enough, if you ask me. Was it me, or did this part of the show seem that much slower than previous years.

Joining the panel again for guest-judging duties, was everyone’s favorite Robo-Spice. If they were going to get one of the guest judges to pull double-duty, why couldn’t have it been Shania Twain. Vicki B. already had a full two hours devoted to her critiques, while most only got an hour, if that.

BEST OF THE WORST

Bikini Boy
Audition Song: Achy Break Heart by Billy Ray Cyrus

• When Ty Hemmerling aka “Bikini Boy” first graced our screen, you knew it was part of some big joke. He didn’t have a good voice and wasn’t a crazy delusional looking for his fifteen minutes of fame. After a bit of research, it turns out “Bikini Boy” is an intern for a Denver morning radio show. His “joke” audition was part of his hazing as “Intern Ty”. I hope he got a decent job offer after his internship. It takes a lot of balls to wear a woman’s bikini on national TV.

Mario “The Giggler” Galvan
Audition Song: Jailhouse Rock by Elvis Presley

• Mario apparently has a nervous habit of giggling when nervous. *giggle* Apparently if you’re around him long enough, it become contagious. *giggle* Just ask Simon, who kept giggling after each one Mario gave. *giggle* PS. That hideous jacket was no laughing matter. *giggle*

Kenny Everett
Audition Song: Be Without You by Mary J. Blige

• As Simon put it so succinctly, he sang like someone punched him and then cried for help. He wasn’t incredibly awful nor super-funny. But you gotta love a little gay homo who adores the queen of hip-hop.

THE BEST

Danelle Hayes
Audition Song: I’m The Only One by Melissa Etheridge

• After reading my recaps, you’ve probably assessed that I’m a sucker for a sob story. Sure Danelle has one, and Simon hit it the nail on the head about her being broken down. Even though at times she came off screechy, I was enamored by her vulnerability and her powerful voice. I hope she does well next week and would love to see her advance if she can control her inclination to scream.

Mark Labriola
Audition Song: Tempted by Squeeze

• How could you not find the chunky former kid-on-the-run adorable? Even more so, how cute was his son? Even though, I don’t think he has a chance in hell of cracking the Top 12 men, I find myself oddly rooting for him. Great personality with a good voice.

Haeley Vaughn
Audition Song: Last Name by Carrie Underwood

• This week’s Lifetime movie of the week comes courtesy of a premature baby who lost her dad. Sixteen years later, that same premie dreams of becoming the first black country-pop star. Be sure to stay tuned on a weekly basis to watch as Haeley attempts to accomplish this feat. You know that’s what the producers are hoping for. Why else would she get this week’s pimp spot. I quite liked her and her voice a lot. She’s not the strongest vocalist, but she’s got that “IT” factor.

Casey James
Audition Song:

• Confession time. I have to admit, I wasn’t interested in him at all, until he pulled his hair down. Then it was… HELLO. He was roughneck-scruffy-hot-sexy and apparently he could sing. Everything was a blur when he began to strip. After regaining focus, all I remember was the judges saying “yes”. That’s good enough for me. I can’t wait to see him sing during Hollywood week to see if he can actually carry a tune.

Nicci Nix
Audition Song: Something Kinda Ooh by Girls Aloud

• She flew all the way from Florence, Italy to sing a Girls Aloud song. With a helium-like speaking voice, she reminded me a bit of Paris Bennett from season five. The first half of her audition was pretty good, but then she began to get pitchy during the second half. Apparently Nicci is originally from San Francisco and has a music video and single. You can check it out at YouTube.

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